Jealousy. Why you torment me?
Before getting rid of jealousy, it is necessary to understand what is it.
We will not begin to address reference books and dictionaries, and we will address literature. What jealous literary hero comes to mind to the first? Of course, famous Othello.
He had the destroying feeling of jealousy as he was not self-assured the person.
“If Othello was white, young, beautiful and kurtuazno educated, - Veller assumes, - he would blow the nose in this damned presented scarf and laid down to Desdemona in a bed to make love, and put all“.
Of course, in a case with Othello the jealousy is a hypertrophied feeling. The thought of incorrectness of the beloved spouse completely eclipsed his reason. Any fact was presented to the hero by the indisputable proof of betrayal of the wife: the lost scarf - a gift to the lover, a beautiful dress or a hairdress - the forthcoming appointment, bad mood - on the contrary, melancholy for the lover …
But also in modern life are humming the passions comparable to Shakespearean. It is enough to look at the acquaintances, girlfriends. And mass media provide the mass of examples what can bring jealousy to.
I think that practically each modern woman at least once in life had this feeling in relation to the husband.
What occurs when the woman learns that the husband has “other“ woman?
In this situation of emotion escape, as from a volcano muzzle:
- pain - you were betrayed by the dearest person;
- anger - you so it loved, and it soiled your love; to
- disappointment - you cannot believe that it so could arrive.
And what it will do in such situation? Will begin to watch the husband, to check his mail, to look through his SMS - ki.
And if the woman also tells the husband that she watched him, then it will cause only pity or disgust. Whether it is wanted by the woman? And what to do to cope with the gushed emotions?
Probably, each jealous woman tried a huge number of ways how to get rid of this exhausting feeling. But why often everything falls back into place?
Yes because to fight against any experiences and it does not make sense to get rid of them. The more you struggle with feeling, the stronger it inflames in your soul.
Therefore I suggest to raise a question differently: “How to overcome jealousy?“
for this purpose needs to do two steps :
1. to Reduce the emotional heat;
2. to Establish the true reason of jealousy (a low self-assessment, mistrust to the partner, desire to revenge / revenge, offense, feeling of injustice).
You will not be able to find the jealousy reason while in soul the hurricane of feelings storms. Therefore first of all it is necessary to carry out small therapeutic work .
For this purpose you need two sheets of paper of the A4 format which are stuck together by an adhesive tape. Exercise will take about an hour, however there are no temporary restrictions.
So, think of jealousy, completely plunge into it and “live“ it. Allocate yourself hour of time and consciously plunge into this feeling. Also begin to draw anything. Draw, not to end the allocated time yet.
So, you lowered the emotional heat. The first step is taken.
And now we will pass to the second step. Let`s deal with feeling of jealousy. Ask yourself a question: “My feeling of jealousy that you wanted to tell me what to show and what to pay attention to? “
Look for the answer in the heart. Having stated the feelings, you will be able to realize what caused such jealousy?
Everyone will have the answer...