What do we fill the life with?
Activity - a basis of human life. It is difficult to argue with this fact. The most active human organ - his brain. We generate thoughts constantly. It is unceasing. Often getting to a trap of persuasive repetitions.
The state when we carry on never-ending dialogues with by itself or with the imagined image of the character of our reality with which we experience difficulties in communication for today is familiar to everyone. And if all - it is a character external, we have a real opportunity to transfer mental dialogue to clearing of the relations at a meeting. And if it is conversation with itself? How it can be finished productively?
At everyone the way.
If a context - for self-accusation , it is possible to look guilty “on the party“. Guilty it is possible to make weather, a magnetic storm, day of a lunar calendar. Mother with the father, brothers - sisters, the angry chief, the husband - the wife. The country in which was born by a tragic mistake, the government and the president. Legchayet? Well, probably. For a long time? It hardly …
Can try to take the responsibility for the today`s difficulty. To tell itself: “Everything that I do, for some reason is necessary for me. How I myself do guilty now? What for? For what I blame? And how I can wash away this guilt?“
If a context - searches of sense of the existence , is very probable to meet at last full nonsense of both the personal history, and all life of mankind here in general. And to be puzzled with mankind in general in degree more safely, than the personal contents.
But if all - to risk to lay the blame on itself, that is a high probability to meet the universal loneliness. With the alarm from uncertainty and unpredictability of life. With lack of any guarantees of approaches of it … entire happiness in foreseeable since the moment “now“ the future.
And there is a chance to feel empty. “In itself“. On fractions of a second to realize that your life is with what you fill it … Day by day.
And yours “now“, perhaps, the only strong support on a time scale. And if on the future of hope such … illusive, maybe, right now to look round? Where you? Who are you? Who all these people whom habitually you divide on close and far? Than and whom you live?
And why to you the is constant to be slipped “now“ - where you run? From what and from whom?
The biggest enemy of ours “today“ - alarm … It whispers to us: “And let`s think now how we will live or act tomorrow? At meeting in a week? How we will spend holidays in half a year? And you remember five years ago?“
Ya hardly I urge you absolutely to cease to remember and dream … Here unless to be anxious less about what already behind - and suddenly will halloo? Or to carry out life in convulsive attempts to glance in “tomorrow“ … by
We can estimate happiness of ours today if we, for example, get sick tomorrow … Then tomorrow we will think with regret: “Here what I … Yesterday mourned and anxious, and it appears, so everything was good!“ Or, having got into some disgusting situation, we think: “As I was quiet and happy still yesterday …“
But tomorrow ours will become today - alas - past … Irrevocable … Unattainable … I Write
these words now, and me so … it becomes chilly. It is disturbing. In a disgusting way. Perhaps to go to eat something tasty? To see the movie theater? To read the book? To call the girlfriend? To remember the last conflict at work and to steep in such saving dialogue with the imagined offenders?
Or in general to try to lose these rare moments of leisure when my look is turned inside and focused on … than? On internal my space? In which suddenly there was a pause in hum of internal voices / run of habitual thoughts / consumption “tasty“ of impressions of the environment?
I fade. And I am filled by emptiness. Its smack - alarm. And at once to my services a heap of the checked ways of this alarm to avoid … And maybe, to risk to be late here? To stay empty? Ready - or not - to accept some micro - change of the habitual form? To stay inactive in my habitual understanding of this word?
Delay of speed or a stop of vital “whirl“ - it why can be useful?
The first that comes to mind - better to orient in space. On the run your background is merged in the monotonous strip rushing by. Such habitual series of events and persons. Than quicker you run on life, than the kaleidoscope of yours “otvlekalok“ flashes quicker - it seems to those more monotonously. More boringly. And the more sharply and more volume it is necessary to excite itself that though to derive some pleasure …
A on slow to the course - or in a stop - suddenly from habitually conjoint background details begin to appear. Every time different. Therefore still that change of habitual speed does you by more attentive to what occurs “here and now“.
Risk to devastate yourself from habitual thoughts / desires / immediate actions in search of their satisfaction right now. Also focus the attention, for example, on the bug creeping on a grass? In difficult drawing of clouds? On a sound of the singing crickets? On - a nature wreath? On the body? Breath? To a habitual pose?
Feel separate of habitual vanity. What can occur here? It is a lot of any miscellaneous … Pleasant is also not present. Or absolutely nothing …
In my experience sometimes there is a chance to feel suddenly as Part of the Universe. Just during this instant watching herself and life …
I to meet suddenly the happiness, happiness of this minute when the torture emptiness concedes to feeling of participation in sacrament of Life.