Rus Articles Journal

Divorce or marriage for the sake of children?

Divorce - it is always heavy. And, at the same time, the right for divorce - important achievement of modern society. But even now, despite a freedom of choice, many couples for years continue to live together only for the sake of the general children. At the same time spouses sincerely believe that parting of parents injures the child much more, than life in a family where there are no love and mutual understanding for a long time.

Someone can object: “He small and does not guess anything!“ This deep delusion. As if carefully parents hid the pain, irritation or indifference, as if skillfully played “a safe family“ to the applause of neighbors and relatives - your child feels dissonance unmistakably. Know, the child can never accept divorce, but falseness and pretense -! Children do not need “theater“, they sincerely belong to the world and want the same in relation to themselves.

The reason of a children`s susceptibility is explained by strongly developed unconscious. Children do not understand logic of adults, do not understand many clever words, but at the same time see everything that stays “behind scenes“. And, the most sad that not only see, but also take it with themselves in adulthood.

Doing something “for the sake of the child“, it is worth thinking of how your victim will be reflected in his destiny properly. Believe, “illusion of happiness“, most likely, will bring to the kid in the future huge sense of guilt which reason - sufferings of parents “for the sake of it“. And in the present problems with health are possible. Often children cannot make a protest words and explain that they feel therefore they signal about the pain diseases, baseless scares, tears or aggression.

Exit one: the best that parents can make - to take care of own happiness, without shifting responsibility for the decisions to the child.

Of course, the best option for the kid - grow in a full family where mother and the father love each other. Reflect, perhaps, you still such parents? Often spouses make the precipitate decision on divorce as a result of family crisis, but, nevertheless, continue to have to each other warm feelings. In that case hurry up to deal with the relations! If in your family, despite all difficulties, there is a love - you have every chance to restore harmony and to make happy and themselves, and your child!

In other cases it is obvious to a married couple that not to rescue marriage any more. And, so it is a high time to think how to leave, having hurt the kid at least and remaining good parents. First of all, explain to the child that he still has mother and the father who very much love it. It is also necessary to consider one important feature of children`s perception: than the child is younger, that more he is inclined to see the reason of everything that occurs around, in itself. Therefore be not too lazy to explain to the kid that he it is perfect at anything here! And, the main thing, keep respect for the former partner.

Anyway, the choice always for you! What decision you would not make, be happy. And then your kid with pleasure will follow this example!