Unfinished fairy tale
Chapter 1. How the tsar - the state brought order to the kingdom. And what from this left.
Far away, in the fairy state once upon a time there was a tsar. Also was not at it in the state about. Boyars took away property on zones on offshore, on foreign. Lackeys ran up who where will be able. Merchants of duty did not pay to treasury, and imperial differently as and did not call currency wooden.
I, the annoying, other tsars and kings laughed at our tsar-father on the quiet and nicknames to it different, bad thought out.
Thought the tsar-father, thought how to bring order to the state, and solved at first, personal having turned on the computer on worldwide network to travel. Maybe there council will be found. And as this fairy tale was written in a century 21, existence in it of computers and different other iPhones let surprises nobody.
At first the tsar, as usual different manually destroyed viruses. Manually, as anti-virus did not put the program essentially. Because boyars, a network - a world wide web in the palace managing, whispered to the tsar that the piece this the kike - Masonic and a traffic from it becomes allegedly worse. Well, in everything in that kingdom - the state of the tsar tried to part. checked
Then e-mail. Two letters in a box lay. The first from some Marfa from Kiev. Wrote that came across incidentally on a social network an avatar imperial, and reminds that they sat together in the third class tserkovno - parish school at one school desk. And even kissed several times.
- Fie on them, schoolmates former, - looking at the image of the woman who grew plump and in it without guessing the former girlfriend at all, the tsar-father swore. Also erased delity the letter the first.
In the second message the cousin from Germany reminded that soon winter and if, the cousin as that year gas will block a pipe, …
the tsar did not begin to read up the letter. Pressed shares repeatedly a ring with diamond Persian. Also decided to glance political on a forum. In which under a nickname of tsar it chatatsya.
A abuse the tsar and all his environment seigniorial obscene different words there. But except abuse at a forum the tsar did not find any construct on correction of affairs in the state. It was visible a world wide web to it the thin assistant in this case.
I it then in real solved council to call. Called two most well-born, from Ryurikovich of boyars.
The first boyar, having scratched in a nape, speaks:
- I, the tsar-father, in policy is not strong. Mark on boundaries to a system more and more. But it seems to me that vorog are already ready to capture us. There in the neighboring, our former western provinces of a catapult put. Kernels sharpen.
- In whom they pulyat - that conceived, - the tsar was upset. - I keep all the treasures in their vaults. That at us did not take away.
- In you, a nadezh - the tsar. In you. And still, most their main of - for the seas - to the ocean called you Malyuta Skuratov and the agent of guardsmen.
The tsar grew furious, and gave was to give the order to all the submersibles to pulnut on voroga through the North Pole. But thought again and decided to listen to the second boyar.
That, having scratched a beard and having made a clever face, said: there is no
- In the modern multipolar world an opportunity to resist globalization process because...
The tsar did not begin to call the executioner. Itself beheaded the boyar. Understood that the silly builder of boundaries state is better than the clever gas-bag.
But cut the heads to boyars or do not cut, about in the state all the same will not increase.
Also the tsar decided - to clean a nadezh all horizontal corrupted components and to build one honest and transparent vertical. So transparent that through it everything was to see.
Called builders skilled of St. Petersburg. Build that a mansion there for heating firm wanted in fifty just over wreaths, but so far to them advised to postpone. Is Like, more useless to get above, than the high-rise regulations state allow.
Builders began to build a vertical, the tsar is happy.
In a kingdom - the state boyars were built in frunt. Even Kazan, Kalmyk and other statesmen. The army streletsky was endowed with new caftans. Especially seamen and pilots will not rejoice.
The thought seigniorial was replenished with young ladies. Those that were included in the special list. Oh, pleased the father - the tsar. Clear-eyed, the person are pure, flexible as Olympic champions. However, other boyars much better them are able to cave in. Experience is experience.
Compared for interest. So, Duma the Head it was three times bent and put out the head between legs. Asks:
- is normal, or still?
- is normal, - the tsar answers, a look searching for the beginning of the Head.
- is normal, - boyars agreed, understanding with bitterness what so not to manage.
On an opposite bench in the Duma decided to put opposition. Long looked for, nobody agreed. At last, under pressing and after injections from imperial treasury, found two.
First - the son of the Duma sexton - all tried new to receive boots from a kapterka. The second - from servants, protest well sang songs. Well, it where there:
- Ljubo, brothers, Ljubo...
The tsar-father is happy. All are built, all on a look. But from the Secret Order every day reports unpleasant on a table to the sovereign lay down. Steal supposedly more. Especially those who transparent build a vertical. In a kingdom - the state fans of public game in chess appeared. Will go outside, and let`s figures move. And their main goal was the king in it is full to take or even at all from a board to clean. Sent gendarmes, put in a tight situation a trifle. But here fans of ancient game in the West were indignant and threatened to put a big cap on the Most important Pipe of the tsar-father. And it meant that neither truffles French, nor Spanish wine, nor mussels anglitsky to a table imperial will be given in the morning any more.
The sovereign grieved. He did not expect it from the western partners. Also it was necessary to introduce elements of democracy so alien to all in the country. Decided to create two-party system. One party was led by the senior cousin of the tsar, the second youngest. They differed, these parties, from each other only in the name and the budget. Youngest also gave less. Carried out record over the country of persons interested to enter. All, of course, wanted to get to the senior cousin that there was opportunity more vernopoddanno to address if that. It was necessary to push by force in the second party. But created, at last, and began to brood. How all - to bring order to the state? And as nobody wanted to begin with himself, decided to address the people. There was a tsar-father to a porch imperial, and asks:
- Whether well you live, citizens my true, or boyars absolutely already tortured?
- Well, the tsar - a nadezha, well. To us only the hlebushka and series is more. About cops honest and bandits on TV caught already bothered to watch.
Here, it turns out in what the reason of concern national, - the tsar - the sovereign was delighted. Also disposed to start on all channels in the mode non - stop the “Field of wonders“ loved by all. And itself decided to retire, and began to look around in search of the successor.
The tsar sat down on a flying carpet of merikansky production with an inscription of weaved “Made in China“, and flew over the country of the person worthy to look for. And below - beauty indescribable. Bread on fields ears, men mow hay in white shirts, maids dexterously work with sickles and all songs sing national. The father - the tsar from affection shed a few tears. And that he did not know that a route of vipovskiya boyars found out and arranged it representation to all surprisingly. And on a carpet that - the plane clerks, the visit lighting flew. Then all country imperial learned from newspapers how she well lives. But nobody was surprised to it any more.
The successor was not in regions far, overseas. Directly near a throne imperial sat on the right. Quietly sat, imperceptibly. Was engaged in the program of available towers and tried to lift useless agriculture. Boyars also did not think that the finger imperial will indicate it. But as specified, all showed at once rough willingness to approve the Supreme choice. The pier is not present it from the sea to the sea any more. Young, education any. And in the Order Secret it seems was never registered. In a word, pleased all. Especially as the tsar-father to whom is necessary in a whisper declared that all this is temporary. That he will have a rest at some easy position and again the power Supreme will head.
But soon in this kingdom - the state only fairy tales affected yes auctions mortgage were carried out. The trouble came to the earth imperial from there from where waited, but not so quickly. Boundaries southern were attacked by the tribe Polovtsian, smoked. The flying carpet prospecting was brought down and the tsar-father on assembly U.N. was called words different, disgusting.
- Small and udalenky, - the tsar - a nadezha took offense at them and ordered to look in the army for part streletsky efficient to fight back a vorog fierce. And in a smithy imperial even the medal was shaped “For Tiflis`s release in advance“.
Were at war not for long, but it is productive. The tribe smoked merikanets trained, left the of a spear and onions, and their leader from disappointment ate the totem, on a breast hanging.
I the whole world hostile learned that there is still a gunpowder in imperial powder flasks. And here and football players imperial, the overseas trainer conducted to run and on a ball sometimes began to get, but not to go across the field as happened earlier. And the Most important Pipe earned to the full extent, filling up treasury imperial. And the people came to love the tsar and the successor of his young very much. Even the song such was put:
“It is heavy to one to operate in Russia“ …
Further obscene lines mixed up with patriotic appeals to punish transatlantic vorog went.
the Song came to an end very briefly and capaciously:
“You great darkness. And us host“!
But, as we know, misfortunes never come alone. Wind - a hot dry wind blew from the West, financial brought on the earth imperial, in smooth water crisis. Also the currency local under a slope together with all hopes for life quiet, measured swept. Collected then a nadezh - the tsar a thought the darling on meeting anti-recessionary.
- That, lackeys my true, years lured, became gloomy. Tea in years dashing, transitional to autocracy, and not it was seen before. Let`s brood together now as our kingdom - the state invisible, from the West of the comer, to save from the enemy.
- Our thought not the place for thoughts, - Duma reported on the tsar Golova. - We for you, the father, the supporter you ours, both a stomach and the head on an executioner`s block will put. And here to think - dismiss. We here on other secondary signs were selected.
- Yes, came, - the tsar - the sovereign became gloomy. - Fools only in a peace time are useful. Perhaps merchants, gas and oil trading, from our command of what will prompt.
- We, the father is the tsar, all in full manure, - merchants - dealers began to wail unanimously. - One at us a teperich hope. On you, darling and on growth of the merikansky market mortgage.
- Again these merikanets played a dirty trick on me, - the tsar - a nadezha was upset. - And the treasury at them was gone. And there all fund of my future successors was stored. It is necessary my true to ask opposition for suggestions. And call - to me the fan to rinse boots in the Indian Ocean. It is sick it clever in a box with pictures, the people stupefying, it seems.
- I listen, the father is a tsar - the sovereign, - the oppositionist appointed came running on call. - Any your desire is ready to be granted, would be on what.
- On what you many times were given. Tell - the son of the people expelled how a situation to correct, imperial to fill up treasury again and life offended to calm citizens?
- It is necessary, I think, to somebody to declare war. And at once to be given. Let fools feed us according to the convention Geneva.
- Yes it is a pity for money, on it thrown out, - the tsar became sad. - You drag better here the guardian of the working people lime. The last hope for it remained. Perhaps as remembers about a planned economy.
- There were in our country several governors by the name of Vladimir, - the defender of interests of the proletariat said, having forgotten for a moment that it not on meeting November: Vladimir - the sun is clear. Vladimir is a grave-digger of burzhuin and Vladimir - the friend of oligarchs to which I for some reason was not carried yet. It is asked that to do to the working people if I have no stocks of Norilsk Nickel and Gazprom in that volume about which agreed! As?
- Full Gazprom, - the tsar - a nadezha thought, looking as the politician of this lime on an executioner`s block is taken away. - All is necessary - to ask the people. The people - it is wise and skilled. So many fools ordered it, and he everything exists and is well.
Also there was a tsar again - a nadezha to a porch imperial. Also he asked on the square, the small fry driven filled:
- People, you are happy? nobody to it nothing answered
I because earlier and did not think of it.
A meanwhile the Duma seigniorial made the decision confidential financial to fight against crisis. Also declared through the press imperial because another and was not that crisis in the state is cancelled. And who that another will think, that will be subjected by obstructions of the ambulance. And the rack of the Order Secret will seem them then the resort kurshavelsky.
But was easier to cancel sunrise or a confluence of Oka with Volga. Laws market in the country communal worked as well as in other kingdoms - the states of democracy subject. Bubbles financial and construction burst as soap. Even in the residence imperial thought of reductions. Also solved caviar black more in the mornings not to give plates big.
- I have to be together with the people with the in a time dashing, - is proud the tsar - the sovereign said, signing the decree on a ban of import of horses of import second-hand. - Let`s develop a tyaperich craft small.
- Well at last ease will come out, - exhausted was delighted narodishko taxes. - Perhaps the tsar-father, also publicans damned selecting and fire captains dashing in benches hooks looking for and the gendarmes smoked in malls postrelivayushchy and officials any more not knowing what new horse to buy the last import you where - nibud you will attach on an allowance. Forces is absent any them to serve.
Also took in head to the tsar with the to deal with boyars. Why supposedly they so clamped the supporters that soon from those and there will be nothing to take already. But decided to consult to somebody at first. Painfully delicate topic. Inadvertently you will be mistaken, and lackeys your true easily will start up a bullet casual or a scarf in the lock imperial will strangle unintentionally. They true and devoted only when treasury imperial full.
The tsar-father looked round around, and to council - to ask that and there is nobody. The treasurer is the most important, very old friend it was swindled to death. Former to a horse under a tail lowered all income of the periods a vrazheskiya being put in mortgage papers. “More reliably, the tsar-father, only on ISS“. Fie on it, the accountant who is taught less.
The general is devoted, the top military commander streletsky started reform at the wrong time. Speaks supposedly I will reduce all to the level of the district of the Arbat military. Can send it chairs yes stools in shops to trade?
Main on candelabrums inflated the prices of candles to impropriety. And in the Liliputian - technologies it was washed away. Slippery as the gudgeon soaped.
There is nobody to council to ask. Here also lived, did not resign imperial
I here in time when the people loved as the father … the tsar - the sovereign for an ear of the clown personal, the little fool of the foolish by running caught.
- And well - a miracle court, always the truth speaking, tell what to do to me. As with the to deal with servants. That officials of superfluous did not steal and took only on a rank. That cops - gendarmes not only protected dealers, but also kept order. That handicraftsmen went in for craft, but rendered not tribute to the different fire captains who went crazy. That soldiers, the Homeland protecting, from the commanders had protection. That doctors treated, teachers learned, carpenters carpentered, mowed the mower, women gave birth and all were happy.
Also the clown the eyes which went crazy has a look at the tsar. - Look at
in a mirror, the tsar - the sovereign. And there state you will see the reason of all disorders.
- In a magic mirror, that which future of a pokazyvet, - the tsar asked again, already guessing the answer.
- No, in usual, Borsky`s plant glass. What imperial hangs on kitchen. And do not peer into other mirrors. Curves all of them at you in a kingdom - the state. Not magic.
Also there was the next morning for the people a representation. On the Main square executed on an executioner`s block of the clown imperial. Bezyazyky. And everything it was cheerful. Men adults sbiten drank, wives yes valenoks bought their scarfs, and children played snowballs and molded a snowman.
Chapter 2. How the Baba-yaga of justice looked for, and Ilya Muromets together with the Nightingale - the robber took to the highroad.
Well while the tsar - the sovereign deals with the problems, we will look what at him in the state becomes. And as there his citizens live. And as the kingdom - the state it is somewhere on the suburb of the world civilized, presence in it of any fairy tale characters, I hope, will surprise nobody.
So, slid, slid crisis financial on the world and came to the deafest remote place of our kingdom - the state. To a baba-yaga did not deliver firewood for the winter. The grandmother as usual waited for a tractor from the neighboring village, but that all was not in any way. The izba on a kury leg began to cool down slowly, frights stray zachikhal, have a fit of coughing.
Also the granny was going to the capital - the mother to the administration high, to understand a situation. Got a mortar with the broom from the storeroom, pension of a dresser, in front of the mirror magic imposed a make-up.
Here from nowhere from edges distant, unknown Zmey Gorynych plans. Frightens nobody by fire from a mouth for a reason of economy it is combustible - lubricants.
- Hi, the beldame, - a loud voice greets the head central, and two others on the parties, would look what at the old woman to snatch.
- Bonzhyur, - the grandmother answers, taking seat in a mortar it is more convenient. - How there whether in an upper atmosphere it is not too cold?
- Over Gibraltar it is necessary to soar - the streams ascending and kerosene it is less spent. At the airports - that local without advance payment is not filled any more.
- Gorynych, tell what in the world becomes. Whether war with infidels is about to happen?
- Well, you, the granny, give! Really did not hear - prices of oil ours crashed down about the earth enemy.
- Fathers - Sveta! Yes, from where to me the nobility about such misfortune. I three hundred do not subscribe newspapers of years any more. And I do not respect the TV, one fornication on it. Recently disconnected the Internet. In it only maids naked yes men anxious sit. And I even had the website: www. babi - jagi. net. On it told fairy tale kids. Yes except me there are so much different storytellers now. Here the straight line with the tsar-father passed. So I to it a question in a forehead on e - to a mail: When supposedly we adjust deep processing of wood?
- You about a sidelets Krasnoyarsk would ask, - Zmey Gorynych the head left spitted out.
- All right, will be enough about policy. What arrived - that. Spread.
- I have to you a great request. I fitted into history dashing: decided a lodge to construct in mountains. Under it took the loan in bank savings. On the security let go two heads. The bank also ran the other day, collectors freaky - freezed sent. Demands money.
- I, a zmeyushka, gave up a rostovshchitsevstvo long ago. Since Fedor Mikhaylovich in the novel the old woman - the moneylender banged. Dangerous this business - to friends yes to give to acquaintances of money. To Koshchey it is necessary to you. It has a bottomless treasury. Fly to Koshchey and in legs to him fall. But will not help, address Ilyyushke Muromtsu. It quickly will bring these infidels round.
- Koshchey had me already both and at the Resident of Murom. Immortal in the summer of blue chips bought. Was in the Forbes list in ten, and now … Muromets of a horse put in a pawnshop, on foot goes.
- On credit took a horse?
- On credit. Plus CMTPL. Now - the robber is on friendly terms with the Nightingale. Together passersby are shaken that horse to redeem. Ivan - the tsarevitch got laid off. Brings together frogs on bogs for restaurants capital. The boy about a finger disappears from collectors too. To it it is good, it is small. Vasilisa Prekrasnaya on a podium of the oligarch to herself looks out. Alyonushka in Turkey. Long ago left, maybe, settled. Emelya of clients “bombs“ on stations. To Hodge of Nasreddin the militia tied. He on buildings capital earned additionally illegally. It as it is a gasterbayter.
- And Ivan the Fool?
- That gets a think hide. In party registered. Now sits at the tops, financial directs streams. Will wave the left hand, money flows on the left. Right will wave …
- To the right.
- No, too on the left.
- Yes, far Vanya not the fool. I think, Gorynych, one at you an exit. Hide on a pole on Northern. Only there the Bank will not find, will not send collectors of the freaky.
- Yes I have GPS - the navigator broke. How to get there I do not know.
- On stars fly, head on polar, a boa loaded with debt. And I to the capital about firewood to learn from the administration. Now the administration went small, but there is a lot of it. To somebody and I will get.
- “Stood on the Murom path three pines. Darling to next spring said goodbye to me“, - the Nightingale sang - the robber lying under a birch waiting for the casual traveler.
- You, a solovushka what orientation you will be, - Ilya Muromets asked it, polishing a nazhdachka to gloss the club.
- I strongly love money, - having thought, the Nightingale - the robber answered, - means traditional. And you, the athlete, it is visible strongly you worry before first of all?
- A horse to me only to redeem, more nothing is necessary. I to them, bankers damned, told that I as the veteran of wars Polovtsian have the right for privileges.
- And they?
- Laugh only, show, tell the certificate. Plus certificate of the income. And what income at the retired soldier. Now to me, the defender of the Russian land, on foot it is necessary to go.
- On foot it for health is useful. Give, Ilyyusha, better to a press is esteemed. Yesterday fresh “Businessman Lukomorya“ bought. Here on the first page the decree imperial:
“Idi people Russian there, neznamo where …“. All right, the decree is passed. “Pudges from the Flower city created the new oppositional movement. As the leader of the movement Znayka … declared“. It is uninteresting. “Bailiffs arrested Koshchey Bessmertny`s egg. More property at the former oligarch did not appear“.
- Yes, it was not lucky, to skopets old. Bought, is called, a little bit “Norilsk Nickel“. What else is written?
- Here, curiously. “The baba-yaga was awarded the order “For merits before the Fatherland 4 yesterday - oh degrees. The award was handed personally by the Tsar in in the palace imperial. In the response speech the Baba-yaga promised that she and all forest evil spirits will enter a party“.
- Renegatka is zapechny. Though now all party became. Zmey Gorynych in LDPR. Liberally - different power methods introduces democratic values. Ivanushka, the brother Alenushkin, in “Right cause“ moved. There now all offended are accepted. The Cinderella in the CPRF. Wants to learn to operate the state. The old man Hottabych was closed up by the Wahhabite. After it in the capital several times in a lock-up there is nothing closed. The boy about a finger in ruling party registered. Wants grow, thinks that will cease to offend after that. Three pigs pank cosiness. And you, a solovushka whom you want to become?
- Skinhead. I will struggle with foreigners. As I will whistle, so all of them from the country will sweep out.
- Only whistle more carefully, and even the indigenous people will blow off, as well as was not. Read better further.
- Now. “Culture news. The wolf and seven kids gave a concert in “Olympic“. Who watches, interestingly, this mess. “Sport. Thirty three athletes won the international rugby tournament“. Good fellows, children. This our year. “Sinbad is a seaman by the Fearless patrol ship went to negotiations with the Somali pirates“. This - that where climbs?
- To agree, truly, went about interception of tankers Saudi. Russia rescues from a default.
- The default is when there is no money?
- A default, it when money was. When they are absent - it is usual life.
- Here, about your accomplices former write. “Dobrynya Nikitich went on the PERMANENT RESIDENCE to Israel. The secret Order categorically disproves this information and declares the next provocation from Zionist circles“.
- It precisely lies. The other day saw Dobrynya. In the summer in the South forced neighbors to the world, and now the bouncer in a pivbara earns additionally. Alyosha Popovic in the monastery the novice. Everything at them is good. Only I not destiny appeared. With you, damned, on main road of travelers casual I expect.
- Chu, quietly. There is someone. Then, you will repent then. Beat with a club, only do not overdo.
- To set aside. You that you do not see, Father Frost from an office party come back. The bag on the road drags. We will not wet the grandfather., lukomorsky.
- Kind vechchcher. - Father Frost who is obviously not strongly standing on feet approached travelers. - Happy New Year prazdravlyayu, happiness, pleasure I wish. I distributed all gifts and I look for a halt now.
- Join, the grandfather, the third you will be, - Ilya Muromets helped the old man to sit down on penek. - Here gifts would not prevent us now. Something already in a stomach itches.
- The best gift next year, - Father Frost hiccupped, - lack of reductions in it. Me tried that too. And deer it is possible only ours now. And the Finnish deer it is better, I responsibly declare it.
On these words the grandfather fell down with hemp and zakhrapet. From the sky dense snow went. Snowflakes fell on a red nose of Father Frost, on Ilya Muromts`s chain armor, a bald head of the Nightingale - the robber and at once thawed.
There came new year. The first after the beginning of crisis financial. And then nobody thought yet that Chapter 3 will be even worse … than
. How the tsar two buckets extinguished the fires.
A all the matter is that great came to the earth imperial dry. Such what never before nobody saw before.
Sat somehow the tsar at the computer and, from there is nothing to do a solitaire - displayed a kerchief. Here suddenly shout zapoloshny was distributed.
- the Fire! Fire! - and in chambers imperial through protection streletsky, breaking all customs court, the boyar on situations a swagger - major rushed.
- What burns? - the tsar asked it, with displeasure coming off a solitaire which time of not developing.
- The country burns, your Imperial Greatness.
- All? - the tsar was surprised.
- Almost. In total in a smoke not to see yet how many remained. Perhaps something will also escape. But in the palace imperial this smog domestic will definitely not be, - the boyar right there calmed the tsar. - At us kondishen overseas is included.
- And long ago my kingdom - the state burns? - the tsar asked, playing new solitaire.
- Month as blazes.
- And why you, the paskudnik such did not report on it earlier? Who at me, edrit yours anhydrite, - mazhor is responsible for a swagger. As?
- Do not order to execute, order to pardon, - the boyar in legs imperial failed. - Fires these not simple, but natural. The swagger means any here - to a major is not present. And I am responsible only for it. You signed the decree that natural we will extinguish only with the God`s help now. I think, someone navorozhit here. Perhaps enemies what, unknown want your Majesty to throw off from a throne?
The tsar - the sovereign as if a teapot overseas boiled here. Enemies - that at it and really was not to consider. Also the tsar himself solved state to struggle with trouble. If boyars yes lackeys can make nothing. Threw pasyansny in the hearts of the card and ordered to give a flying carpet and two buckets of water of life, sorcerers imperial loaded.
Sat down the tsar-father on means the aeronautic and flew over the country the fires by these most natural struck. And below chimneys and the women howling. As if Mother again across the country passed.
But saw narodishko the tsar-father and rejoiced.
- To us, to us fly, - shout and hands pull.
- Not at once you will not capture all, - the tsar - a nadezha answers them. - There is a lot of you, and I have only two buckets.
I the tsar solved a miracle marvelous to the people to create. It poured out two buckets on the earth burned, ashes I pokrytoit. And right there on this place the grass turned green and flowers blossomed. And the man blind on whom got too began to see clearly.
And imperial at once reported all newspapers about this miracle. And the man who suddenly began to see clearly in them told the impressions. Like, the first that saw, there was a tsar soaring over the Homeland. And supposedly at once all sorrows previous disappeared by itself. The power Supreme in the chambers imperial does not sit out. Waters narodishko from above as far as possible.
And the tsar departed further meanwhile. And over each village which burned down a trifle scattered. And local threatened the administration with a finger. And that in reply only made a helpless gesture.
Also the people which lost were glad that remember it and care. That in one other kingdom - the state there is no such wise and kind governor. And when the tsar from above promised all fire victims a mansion new it is better to construct former and boyars careless in the fires guilty on an executioner`s block to take away, there now here - that everything at once and began to exult.
Stopped extinguishing the fires. Also let`s throw overseas to start in air of a cap and a petard on pleasures.
A the tsar - the sovereign to the palace came back meanwhile. And there the boyar on a swagger - a major with flowers and with the medal “For Courage on the Fire“ meets.
The tsar fastened a medal on a breast imperial and again for a solitaire of villages.
“Something they at me lately do not develop“, - he thought, again reshuffling cards. - “Can overseas play poker to learn? Yes here trouble. I am not able to bluff. In poker, as well as in policy without bluff it is impossible“.
And the smoke from the burned-down villages filled imperial rooms meanwhile and any kondishen overseas already could not cope with it.
Chapter 4. As the tsar of mass media ruled
and that from this left
the tsar-father Thought, thought how to improve an unenviable position of the kingdom - the state, and, apparently, found a way out. The most important clerk caused from the Order Printing, newspapers imperial letting out.
- You, - asks, - the lackey, itself - that is read what in our newspapers is written?
- I, the tsar-father, the diploma - that untrained. At us in a kingdom - the state all not in the specialty, and on devotion, personal to you, are put.
- And I here sometimes read, - the tsar to the answer sincere grinned. - Also write everything that popadya in our newspapers. That the submersible utop - noise is made for the whole world. And at us - that much at a wall costs them. Floods, fires natural. And where does not burn, I ask you? Default, crisis, still some misfortune. And the people need a positive in the press. It has enough negative and in life. And letters at you in newspapers some black, sad.
- Only order, the tsar-father, - got a fright the clerk from the Order Printing. - Now I will dispose, and from tomorrow`s morning we will give out to the clerks writing red ink.
- It is not enough, - the tsar solved. - It is necessary to change policy editorial. All our misfortunes from the fact that we print the wrong words and expressions. Here, for example, write that our biggest dam blew up. And it is necessary as?
- How, tsar-father?
- It is necessary to write that there is a planned transition to lighting of houses a splinter. Cheaper and more eco-friendly. Or here about August. Allegedly all our troubles in August are created. Lies full. At us and in other months of a lot of things occurs. Means, August is renamed in serpen. And in the serpena at us so far everything is normal!
And here incurred the tsar-father. The clerk only managed to remember. Next day newspapers imperial reported about the end of crisis financial in connection with total absence of finance in treasury. There is no money, there is no crisis also! Then about the fires wrote. Like, there was a mass hallucination. Enemies from - for the seas - the ocean there all in tea poured something. About flashers on carriages seigniorial specified that marks it is special and who to look at them, but not a muzzle to the earth will be kneeling, the thunder and a lightning will strike that at the same time.
And the decree imperial placed that it is obligatory to read newspapers from now on to all. And who will shirk, a birch on a stable lordly or the rack in the Order Secret expects that.
Personally the tsar signed the decree and dated: serpenya it is 19 that years from the beginning of appointment to a throne imperial. And how the tsar-father to a throne was appointed, it already another story altogether.
Chapter 5. How Ilya Muromets with companions rescued Fatherland. with
A while the tsar - the sovereign worked wonders on the flying carpet, Ilya Muromets extinguished the fires in the province. As there the woods lit up, the athlete of the friends - companions clicked. And together with Dobrynya Nikitich and Alyosha Popovic began to extinguish the wood near the city of Murom. And to them in the help and the Nightingale - the robber, habits harmful forgotten for a while, and the Boy - with - a finger, and Alyonushka from Turkey arrived. Emel`s
on the furnace brings water. Zmey Gorynych the passer fell lets. Vasilisa Prekrasnaya and Ivan - the tsarevitch shovels throw the earth and fill up fire. The baba-yaga cooks on all chestna the company. And think badly of all tsar-father. It is necessary to finish so the country that all burned down. And neither fire hoses, nor hooks, nor respirators. What concern - there is nothing. All boyars damned plundered. And the service imperial, a swagger - major in actual fact exaggerated appeared.
were Extinguished by them thirty days and thirty nights. Also did not give to fire the earth darling completely to destroy.
A as the fire extinguished sat down to hold council. How to live - to live further. All already understood that the country will not sustain the second such fire.
on council for a seniority acted as the First Kashchey Bessmertny.
- I a lot of things in this world saw, - the former enemy Ivana - the tsarevitch says. - It is a lot of and itself of harm to our earth put. But such lawlessness even in a bad dream could not dream. Fire, water and copper pipes. Full sediment. Besides these bailiffs dart about, dart about …
- Yes wait a moment you, - Ilya Muromets interrupted it. - Give in essence.
- And if in essence, it turns out that our tsar-father the first enemy to the Russian land. And all his boyars. Especially these police officers. The last egg was selected!
- Nothing, and without it you, Kashcheyushka, the man visible, - interfered the Baba-yaga. - I suggest to send the petition to the capital. So supposedly and so. The Mozha, the tsar also does not know what at it occurs here?
- Aha as does not know, - imitated the grandmother Malchik - with - a finger. - You as an award from hands personal received and most important attached all the evil spirits in party, and …
- As you talk to seniors, - reproachfully looked at the kid Vasilis Prekrasnaya. - I suggest to create the party and to fight by exclusively legitimate methods. Let`s write the program, we will be registered … Here all amicably burst out laughing with
. And, were ill even with laughing. And the word then was taken by the Nightingale - the robber.
- Friends. All of us together defended the wood in which I already one thousand years plunder lonely travelers. Thanks. You rescued my workplace. And with work you know now as. Now in essence. I suggest to stir the people to action against the caught stealing mode. Let`s distribute clubs, we will organize working groups.
did not allow the Nightingale - to the robber to continue. Because well history was known. And here the word took Emel.
- I have a wide experience in fight against tsarism. It is necessary to go to a pond, to pull out a magic pike and … All amicably rustled with
and did not allow Emeli to speak. Is Like, more useless, here to use magic. Fight has to be honest.
- I Offer, - having interrupted noise, Ivan - the tsarevitch cried, - I suggest to apply special strategy. Every year on December 31 we will leave to the palace imperial. And to hold the constitution in hand.
is what else for a wonder? - Zmey Gorynych was surprised.
is, zmeyushko, such law under which we have all rights for processions, demonstrations …
- And, a fantasy, - knowingly spitted out Gorynych on the earth. - I love it. Orwell especially. No, the tsar should be called on a duel. I am ready!
- That you, Gorynych, - the Baba-yaga threw up the hands. - I, a belt at it heard some black. Will wave the left hand, the whole army falls. Will wave right …
Here all and fell silent and with hope have a look at Ilya Muromts sitting aside on hemp and cleaning a club from a soot. That got up to the utmost and told shortly. - Will drop down
to shoot the breeze. We sit down all on Gorynycha and we fly to the palace imperial. And there on the place it will be visible what to do.
Chapter 6. How the tsar the kingdom - the state left alone.
A this head is not written yet. And everyone who up to the end read up the fairy tale can compose it. And this fairy tale has no morals. It is not ended yet. But there is a wish to hope, as the lavish feast will be. And the good will overcome the evil. And the country will not burn any more. And bailiffs will lag behind Kashchey. And to Ilya Muromtsu the horse will be returned. And Alyonushka will not go to Turkey more.
All. Thanks for attention.