How it is correct to refuse to the person his request?
As are a lot of on light of people who cannot refuse to anybody anything! Also drag for themselves not only freight of the duties, but also requests acquaintances, relatives and colleagues. And advantage of it, naturally, any. We have bright people: in a trice sees to whom it is possible to shift part of the work gratuitously. Certainly, situations happen different, and I do not urge to answer any request " at all; is not present . In more detail about situations when it is necessary to refuse, it is possible to esteem in my article When and why it is necessary to tell is not present ?.
If you look on our website for articles how to force the person to agree, but not to refuse to you - you will easily find their great variety. And if you are tried to be convinced, you have to learn not to give in to this belief, truly? There is a strong wish to give several useful tips how to refuse to the person his request or desire.
we Will assume, you about something were asked. Make a pause. Think whether it is necessary to you, whether it is necessary to do it and what consequences will be: and suddenly after that your reputation will sharply fall? And all will begin to go by you? Horror. And maybe, on the contrary, after performance of a difficult and responsible task about you the rumor as about the great and gifted person will go?
Never you speak I will think let`s look . All this excuses, will lag behind you only for a while, then to you all the same it is necessary either to agree, or to refuse. So deal with it now.
we Will assume that your colleague or - upas My God! - the chief offer some project, and you understand that it is a complete nonsense, and you will be only a laughing-stock if you take part in its development. Be not afraid to express the thought: not offensively, without humiliating the person. Just explain him what you know. You want not to show the superiority, and just want prosperity of firm, success of common cause. It is possible not to destroy totally idea, it is simple to turn it the weak place, to point out unostentatiously the defects.
When you speak is not present it is not necessary to explain the reason long. Couple of weighty phrases, strong argument. In total. If the person insists, stupidly repeat (it is possible in other words) the same. Eventually, asking it will bother.
Very high-quality reception of refusal. You open truth of an assignment, you find its shortcomings for you. For example, You really want that I was late at work for two hours and took away this time from my family? Well, I will look for information necessary to you on the Internet, and you when you print out it, will unpack also to me couple of leaves of that material at the same time that I will give you (it is supposed that you have no printer and the applicant will go to print somewhere to other place).
Refuse a request, but not to the person. Accurately distinguish these borders. It is not necessary to remember professional and personal qualities of the person in conversation.
Can refer to other person - the wife, mother, the chief, the child - itself - that I am glad, but here do not allow also all!
Refusal - quite delicate topic. Someone considers - love yourself, spit on all and someone - both you to others, and others to you . To argue who is right - senselessly. On me, the golden mean and freedom in the choice of the decision are so best of all. To silly help all, especially if vaseto weighs, and you with all the heart wish to refuse and cannot. As proof, here to you classical example.
The honors pupil on control ask to help. If helps - not the fact that it will not be noticed by the teacher, besides, the schoolgirl will waste time and can not manage to make the option. Or will just distract and will make a silly mistake in work. Gratitude from the schoolmate quite illusive: such people usually not especially grateful.
And in case of refusal to help - the schoolgirl bad and the greedy person, the botanist. However companions will cease to be angry soon, insults they only try to touch and hide envy. Respectively, when nevertheless this honors pupil will allow someone to write off, it will be appreciated above than if she rushed to help any: deficiency of goods or service raises the price.
And in general to solve to you, dear reader, I only wanted to help! Anyway, good luck to you and freedoms in decision-making!