Who such Lille B.? The secret of its heartbeat
At first the thin line from stars in a firmament seemed to me strange familiar, close and warm to the touch. The arrow - imagination departed through space and time, and I understood that I kept the appointment not with that girl. Only one line for some reason was at the tip of the tongue:
“ If stars light, it means... “
A still bright image of two ladies.
Both girls are young and very nice, but one of them strongly resembled something shining and bright, fine as if a star in the sky.
A confident step young Mayakovsky goes near the girl. With that which radiates light. I understand from conversation that her name - Lille. Beautiful, pleasant, sonorous. Here I cannot listen to myself only in any way and understand: why the name of Lille causes in me so many emotions? And maybe not a name at all, and this strange image?
They with Mayakovsky speak about stars. Now I begin to remember something …
“ … If stars light, means … “
… No! Nothing it means! Near Mayakovsky any more not Lille! It is obvious that, the second, other, foreign girl! He is cold with it, but reads for it already familiar to me to pain “ If stars light … “ such tone as if just composed all this for this the most others to his heart of the woman.
I as if feel that that, the second girl (or the third … the tenth, - I cannot already understand the account) - illusion, a translucent haze. Suddenly and Mayakovsky becomes poorly distinguishable in an evening attire of the world, and fog of a dream falls down from my eyes!.
I wake up. Minute I do everything on the automatic machine and when eyes cease to stick together from a dream, at last, I understand that my subconsciousness revealed before me one more secret from which understanding on my body ran light silk a warm breeze.
I remember what I know about Mayakovsky and poetry in general. Quickly I understand that the answer is simple: practically anything.
Lilichka (as Mayakovsky called her) BRIC was a surprising person, exactly thanks to its light the poet burned so brightly, though “ burned down “ so quickly. Whether but truth “ burned down “? Whether Lilichki`s love to the poet died? I do not think that it is the truth. Such strong feelings as at them, quickly do not die.
Who told that only Mayakovsky had feelings? The poet madly adored Lilichka. It is true with which it is difficult to argue. But also to Lille could not touch that boundless cloth on which Mayakovsky gave vent to the feelings.
Why I speak about it with such confidence? At all not on the basis of night vision or the empty imagination. Just I very attentively read his letters to it and Lilichkina answers to these letters, various memoirs were for me some kind of revelations too. In Lilya Brik and Mayakovsky`s love from which we had so much interesting, still the sea of bewitching secrets. The most surprising that everyone can touch this magic of feelings, it is worth opening the necessary books only.
Everyone who speaks or ever spoke about a dark side of the relations between Brik and Mayakovsky, and the other unions, similar on brightness (if, of course, such unions exist), just never tried to feel that light energy which remains on these relations any decade later …
This strange dream about which I told you, opened for me one more side in the sphere of relationship of the man and woman. I felt how the love of one person is capable to be transformed to pure feelings of another. Most likely, Lilichki`s feelings from Mayakovsky`s love, in the same way, so inflamed years later, his feelings and experiences worked on me.
In my environment there was a girl who was called Lille. It seemed to me the most usual, and I had no special feelings for it. Unexpectedly for myself I began to notice suddenly that it is pleasant to me more and more. There was in it something familiar. And only after this dream I understood that, reading Mayakovsky`s letters to Lilichka (they are impregnated with extraordinary feelings and light), I programmed myself on feelings to the girl with whom I associated a name of Lilya Brik.
In other words, I after Mayakovsky fell in love in “ not that “ To Lille. But heat of these feelings so struck me that I understood: it also is “ most that! “.
Love each other and do not feel sorry for love for each other because the more it in us, the it is more of it in those who are dear to us!