How to behave if at you “ problem neighbors “?
“ Problem neighbors “ strongly entered our life. Earlier - that to take in hand immoderately noisy inhabitants behind your wall new Russians who consider themselves " were a problem, and …
U someone today nearby; owners of life “ at someone a large family with “ children “ very gangster look, at someone behind a wall teenagers adore having fun at two o`clock in the morning, at someone … It is possible to list indefinitely.
And repair does not do only lazy now. Especially in elite high-rise buildings. And this knock and hum of tools, from night to the morning and from morning to the night, can set by the ears the respectable citizens who were quietly living side by side decades.
And here begin … At first admonitions, and then mean tricks and intrigues which turn sometimes into open military operations.
In the Network, by the way, it is full of the websites and forums on the subject “ How to survive “ problem neighbors “. To survive literally. Even firms specialized are … Demand to see, high.
But usually even if it is possible to survive such here neighbors, they are succeeded “ even more problem “. Karma, probably.
So before declaring “ military operations “ try a bit different technologies.
1. Behave naturally. If new neighbors irritate or you are angry with old, try to calm down. Greet. Try not to gossip. Gradually these people will stir you less and less.
2. You proceed always only from own interests. If you are involved in collective war against “ these opposite … “ be politely discharged. To you will be cheaper and quieter.
3. At each opportunity arrive according to the recipe of a cat of Leopold: “ Children, let`s live in peace and friendship! “. I will cite to you from …. Forgot. Generally, the old American police officer talks heart-to-heart to the family of emigrants which just lodged in “ problem quarter “:
“ If neighbors had new expensive thing, you, of course, can call us. However it will be much more provident to express the admiration and if you are able to use it (it was talked of the computer), to teach them to it. If you even the most vile old man addressed for council - do not refuse. When will hijack your car - will quickly find it “. Very wise advice. By the way if your old neighbors started repair, ask
whether you can help them. Most likely they will refuse, but the probability is high that they will consider also your interests.
4. Be not afraid to recognize the hostility, but also leave others the right to have this feeling in relation to you. I understand that it is difficult. “ As so! We silent and fair, and they … “. Strange, but neighbors, most likely, think also.
5. If you begin to be involved in emotional dispute - refuse or reduce everything to a joke. It is impossible to win dispute! The logic will always lose to emotions. Remember conversation in Nemtsov and Zhirinovsky`s air. Then everything managed a glass of orange juice which one of opponents splashed in a face to another. And in life it is possible and to be hit on a muzzle for simple disagreement with the emotional interlocutor. People different are …
6. The enemy should be known by sight. Investigation - eyes and ears of army. Try to learn more about your neighbors. Even if the facts shock you, you will know, at least, that to expect from them. Or perhaps everything will be absolutely on the contrary! There will be common interests, and former hostility will fall down. Most often hostility is just protective reaction, and misunderstanding never gives rise to trust.
7. And main thing! Hostility is just feeling, emotional reaction to events. Try to change reaction, to replace one feeling with another, change the relation.
At you it will turn out! And problem neighbors for certain will become “ less problem “. I have, by the way, all neighbors, even teenagers, very lovely people. Strange …