Let`s practise love navigation?
How many time you had to hear: “ The Boat of love crashed against life “? Why from generation to generation, people hand down this children`s horror story? For what on each family vessel which gave a small leak brand it?
In what all-destroying power of this life consists? Or not in life business? Perhaps and not the boat that was at all, and a catamaran single, and tightly on it it appeared? Perhaps, that ill-fated iceberg on the way of the “ " Titanic; also erected? Or perhaps and on water - that the boat still was not managed to be lowered, the bottle of sparkling its freshly painted board, maybe, still ahead did not concern yet?
Yes, in such business as love navigation is more than questions, than answers. And, unfortunately, newlyweds will hardly be able to be helped by councils “ grown wise experience “ friends, parents or numerous best-sellers about relationship “ yin “ and “ yan “.
Even the role of the husband or wife which is perfectly learned according to series and stories of aksakals in actual fact is absolutely torn off from reality. Family life demands continuous improvisation.
To carry out the vessel on a saving waterway, passing banks of small disorders, deep bombs of offenses and thresholds of mutual reproaches, in power not to each beginning captain. Especially, it turns out that there is on the vessel one more captain with whose opinion - it is necessary to reckon as bondage as will. It is necessary to choose constantly some compromise course as physics does not allow to float by one ship in different directions laws.
With mine “ kapitanshy “ we live in a legal marriage three years. “ The Experience is small for instructive stories “ - you will tell and, undoubtedly, you will be right. But I also do not apply for instructiveness, just there were a wish to share some secrets on protection of the boat of love against blood-thirsty life.
Most of all I with family life am helped by sense of humour. Here where KVN - ovsky experience was useful.
The most important achievement in love navigation I consider disposal of our relations of " templates; Mother Spoke to me, leave for rich! “ or “ All of them are such, one it is necessary to them! “ and so on. I with undisguised sarcasm and irony lost all this on behalf of the wife at the intensity emergence moments. Certainly, it is important not to go too far in this acting.
As soon as we got rid of similar cliches, it turned out that the majority of problems are resolved by itself, without verbal duel and masterly game on nerves. Having cleared a problem from “ peel “ it is easy to be convinced that its kernel is simply microscopic a little.
You should not check the love boat for durability, shaking its pulling blankets. Here it is better to lose fight for the sake of a victory in war, in war not with the spouse, and with life, of course!
I had to meet young people who said that they essentially will never take in hand a rag because not man`s this business! It is sure that such extremist will hardly be a happy family man. You should not differentiate accurately duties in a family, otherwise business will reach full absurdity. For example, periodic washing of ware, or cleaning does not seem to me shameful and to make an exceptional dinner to us, men, quite on forces!
If so historically it developed that the man and the woman have to establish a family, it is necessary a trial and error method and periodic “ nastupaniye on a rake “ to adjust relationship.
The main, in my opinion, enemy of any relations is a strange privychkasnachala in any ways to answer the question “ Who is guilty? “ and only then, having become exhausted after long altercations, to look for the answer to the question “ What to do? “.
One more reason of many failures in operation of the debugged family mechanism - effect “ snowball “. For example, you incidentally broke a favourite cup of the spouse, and began … “ Here always you so, anything you cannot entrust, hands at you curves, you cannot normally make anything … You to me spoiled all life … I for you, and you … “ etc.
I week of sidelong glances, remarks through clenched teeth is provided to you. Not really cheerful picture? Or you will tell, so does not happen?! No, unfortunately, happens, and it is very frequent. An exit one - be simpler! Any cup in the world does not cost that there is so much mucks to tell to darling! Then, of course, everything is adjusted, but the deposit of offenses at the bottom of your boat collects and, eventually, it goes to a bottom.
It is always necessary to remember that the love is the only true value, and your boat of love - the only dry, warm and reliable place in the huge ocean of life.
The most important, you treat indulgently others shortcomings and is more strict to own. It is not so easy as it seems at first sight! Learn not just to listen, and to really hear the spouse, this invaluable skill will relieve you of many problems.
Successful to you swimmings, seven feet near Kiel! Bonds Voyage!