Whether It is necessary to tell the man all the secrets?
Emma Korrigan, heroine of the novel of Sofie Kinsella “ You are able to keep secrets? “ at some moment is frank: “ The meaning of life became suddenly clear to me. Men and women - not enemies. Men and women - soulmates which look for also find each other. And if from the very beginning they were honest and frank, at once would understand it. All this mysterious and detached look, estrangement and arrogance - nonsense! Everything should be shared secrets from the very beginning! “
I will not go into details about what pushed Emma on such conclusions, and, perhaps, I will hold back how it hasty took away then all the words back. I only wanted to suggest to talk about honesty. About honesty in the relations between the man and the woman, between partners, between the people loving each other.
Whether It is necessary to tell the man all the secrets? Whether it is worth devoting it in all smallest details of the life?
Yes, it is obvious that if the young lady on the question “ How there passed day? “ will begin to list all events which happened to it without stinting details (“ Oh, darling, you know, in the bus such lady - a nightmare simply sat next to me; from it smelled “ Red Moscow “ and I even wanted to ask where now it is possible to buy this masterpiece, and then thought that it for certain from a chest still, hi - hi; and at work at me the computer turned on not at once, I called Petya - well, remember, such ryzhenky boy who all the year round wears a jumper with deer, I still told you how he to me repaired the printer six weeks ago, - and it was so long picked my computer that I even went down in buffet to have a bite; and they warmish had a coffee today, but brought new cakes, such tremendous, you know, they are strewed with nutlets, and inside chocolate, it is just a masterpiece, I will bake such on Sunday if, of course, we do not go to your parents; well and so, when I returned, Petya reported that … “) … Well and so, if the young lady does this focus, then the man on the third offer has all ears - will wither. And hardly it sometime again will decide to ask it the same question.
I do not think also that the man should be devoted in all peripetias of the last novels - as, however, you should not inquire at him details of his last relations. Yes, I know, curiously, but, believe, you will become better to sleep from it not.
So where to draw that distinction dividing full frankness before the man and an immemorial postulate what in the woman there has to be a riddle? Let`s consider two opposite images.
1. Girl “ stop up - a nose - darling - I - now - I will break wind “.
It knows all its tastes and preferences. He knows that she hates J Lo, but always with interest considers journal articles with her photos.
He knows that at it 40 - y the size of a leg and that during the winter it gained ten extra kilos, eating ice cream in front of the TV though swears to the fitness coach that after 6 - ti does not eat. In any case: she too quite often misses trainings, preferring to take a walk with girlfriends on shops, and then to note purchase of a new t-shirt for 100 rubles a big glass of beer and chips.
She can quietly come to pee while he washes in soul, and, sitting on a toilet bowl, to begin to read to it article from last year`s women`s magazine. She hates ragout which his mother prepares every time when they visit her therefore secretly throws out this masterpiece of culinary art in its plate, convincing his mother that “ everything was so tasty, I already ate up, and here Arkasha wants an additive “. Yes that there: he inserted it once a tampon because “ terribly curious “.
2. Girl “ ragout - yours - mothers - darling - is simple - wonderfully “. He does not know
how many he actually costs “ these charming " shoes; which, according to her, she bought in sekond - Hyundai. He does not know that she does not know how to cook at all, and and the fat-free yogurt buys those delightful avocado salads in the next supermarket. He still thinks that she is a natural blonde, and standing it had no hair since the birth.
It cannot descend in a toilet when he houses, and packings with laying and tampons hides in the most far corner of a locker in a bathroom. He is sure that she adores the Russian classics (in the evenings glances over the book hided under a mattress with summaries to flash the reasons apropos “ Belkin`s Stories “ at breakfast).
He fondly believes that it has the third size of a breast, and not the so first though cannot understand in any way why she did not put on an openwork brassiere that he presented to it. And also does not know that it works as the secretary, but not a top - the manager as she claims. Was also a virgin when they got acquainted.
Yes, I exaggerate a little, but all this only to show this difference. Having asked this question to several familiar men, I heard that the girl with secrets very much is even useful to single sex, what difference how many there are shorts and as whom actually it works if in the morning they leave forever. And unnecessary information on literary preferences and passionate eagerness of the girl without secrets to shave armpits right now, “ and today this moron of uncertain orientation in the gym so me drove that that I stink now as " pine forests; will it is unlikely cause interest in the man with whom she got acquainted half an hour ago and is going to leave forever his barchelor dwelling tomorrow morning.
As it is banal sounds, but all individually. Listen to yourself, to the man, to your relations. And at a leisure you can try on one of images. Love to you!