What is jealousy?
Jealousy - one of the strongest, destructive and painful emotions . Often it is considered as a measure of love of one person to another. Absence of jealousy, on the contrary, is often treated as an indifference sign so in case of doubts one person can even test a power of love of another, trying to cause in it jealousy.
If to define concept more precisely, then the jealousy is fear of loss, than demonstration of love rather. Unreasonable and frequent manifestations of jealousy testify not so much to mistrust to the partner how many about disbelief in own ability to hold the mutual relations in the face of even insignificant competition. When the jealousy reaches such degree, the only thing that your partner cannot give you, it is confidence. Your feelings of unreliability and inferiority are that that you cannot believe anything else except that so frightens you: your place is taken by someone another.
When the jealousy is reasonable ?
As jealousy - it is fear to lose something expensive, the ordinary person cannot but feel threat for relationship. The shown jealousy depends both on practicalism, and on self-checking. The following remarks, I hope, will help to solve to you whether your jealousy is justified (or jealousy of your partner).
You have the reasons to test jealousy if your partner suspiciously behaves? If in routine of well organized life suddenly there are considerable, but inexplicable changes, your suspicions are probably reasonable. Suspiciousness always expands at accumulation of proofs, so far either will receive confirmation, or will lead to divorce. At emergence of suspicions to afford flash of jealousy and to give to the partner the warning signal of your concern quite naturally.
You have the reasons to test jealousy if the partner at your presence shockingly flirts with somebody? It testifies to its bad manners, and you have the right to state it reproaches. But it could be far from thought to offend you, and could and provoke consciously you to be convinced of your love, or, enduring offense, wanted to vanish. However, what there were its motives, your jealousy has a positive focus openly to express and strengthen the feeling of self-esteem.
the Jealousy is unreasonable when it arises only from your own feelings of humility or unreliability. Infinite questions of how your partner spends time without you, set only because you suspect existence of other life on the party, are offensive, can arouse indignation of the partner and have the most harmful effect. Surveys of its linen for identification of physical signs of incorrectness are reckless if you have no undoubted proofs that he deceives you.
It is unreasonable to show jealousy of people whom he knew and loved to a meeting with you. The fact that he (she) with you now, has to be enough to be confident in his (her) love. If you are jealous him of the past, endure it about yourself.
If you never show your jealousy, you, apparently, are very wise. However do not allow the partner to offend yourself or to endanger your relations. If you did not test jealousy anywhere, then or you had to are self-assured happiness extremely the person and absolutely quiet for durability of the relations, or you are not touched by thought that you can lose the partner.
Restoration of trust
Jealousy - very serious problem for this purpose who found indisputable incorrectness of the partner. Even if you know that there are no reasons for suspicions now, the concern that the incident can quite repeat once is quite natural, and the way to the similar conclusion is far shorter now. It reduces your self-assessment that in turn forces you with a bigger readiness to believe that the partner will prefer you almost any other person.
To restore trust, mutual sensitivity is necessary for . Of you the unusual determination not to subject the partner to every minute cross check on an occasion of each step will be required not to keep it in continuous defense. The partner in turn has to create confidence that you constantly it is aware of his affairs, and as far as possible to spend free time together with you.
The best way of disposal of jealousy - to be honest in relation to itself and the partner . I hope, after reading of article readers will begin to pay more attention to the darlings, but not shadowing them or an inventing of imaginary sins. Love to you and good luck! Peace!