How to help the teenager to understand his feelings or And if it is not love?
were Begun to whirl by spring love languor and lodged dreams of expectations in pensive eyes of young men and girls. Also they to each other feel such impetuous inclination what is peculiar only to him or her and nobody else, at everyone the only, unique life. To someone the love comes once to lives, and it carries by it through all the existence, someone is not fated to learn this fantastic feeling of overflow by happiness, someone falls in love much, many times …
Each lover, as a rule, accepts object of the sympathy not it what it is, and it what has to be in its vision, and discrepancy to the created image can bring disappointment, force to begin new searches of the ideal. The love is a connection of many emotional states at which there are feelings of passion, attachment, an inclination to proximity, jealousy, fear, dizzy happiness … everything is unique
In the love relations of the girl and young man, all in own way - everyone loves and worries, maybe, probably, but all the same not as another, owing to personal features. Communication with the person of an opposite sex at teenage age is some kind of self-affirmation, and intensity can increase in such relations from - for absence of knowledge and a knowledge of life.
To seniors the real relations between them, how many experiences are important not so much, and very often they take enthusiasm for love. At close communication there can be a fast gap from - for discrepancies of the partner to the image created by imagination of the lover. The former hobby is succeeded by new sympathy, and the young man or the girl can ask themselves a question: “ And if it is not love? “
Sometimes idealize not the specific person, but love generally, creating something very difficult achievable in imagination. Well to adults to explain to young generation that ideal people in the nature do not exist, and it is necessary to get rid of delusions that “ are pleasant only good “ “ fall in love only with heroes “ and that “ only contrasts " meet;. In this respect there are different well-aimed sayings: “ The Love is evil … “ “ Not on good it is lovely, and according to Mila it is good “ the disproving naive expectations, - options can be the most different.
Than the family is capable to help the children? Of course, various explanations, making use of personal experience and the general knowledge of behavior in love, in the relations, in understanding. And it is very important not to be late with them: children have to be prepared for the possible introduction in the sexual relations, they should know that the decision to enter sexual relations is and check on a maturity, both the moral choice, and heavy responsibility.
Both the young man, and the girl making such decision have to be ready to be responsible for all consequences, nobody can guarantee safety. They have to know that early sex life is often deprived of deep mutual feeling, can lead to the personal tragedy, the broken life. And if, besides, it is not love? Some young men and girls do not even guess that sexual communications without love are defective.
In many countries are conducted with twelve-year age at schools of occupation on which teach children to culture and hygiene of the sexual relations, competent use of preservatives. It is necessary to raise children with open eyes, without leaving from reality, for anybody not a secret that they are skeptical about moral criteria of adults enough.
In youth sexual desire happens quite strong, and aspiration to realize it - persistent, and children, generally discuss the arising problems with the peers whose knowledge and statements often happen cynical and confused. Children have to hear from you, dear parents and teachers that they in love unite sensual and spiritual that love it not only requirement and aspiration to possession, but also need for unselfishness, for dissolution loving in cares of darling.
Once Greeks called contrasts - to take and give - different poles of the same love feeling (love - an Eros and love - an Agape feast).
the Behaviour in love should study, often young men and girls do not even know features of psychology of the darlings, make sometimes absolutely groundless claim. It is necessary to teach children to understand questions of the sexual relations, the nobility how to be with jealousy how to behave that feelings amplified that attachment … did not leave
you noticed that your girl tinted lips lipstick, and the boy smartens up long in front of the mirror, and were disturbed: “ And suddenly it is love? “. And perfectly - do not miss time, protect the children, you teach them to all useful and be not tired to study.