Age - an obstacle to marriage?
Will be a question not absolutely of age at which the love comes. It will be a question of an age difference between partners. Is it important? What pushes very young girls to go in marriage for old men - calculation or unconditional love? What in general to consider “ too big “ age difference?
The statistics says that in Russia all become frequent cases of marriages when the wife suits the husband in the daughter. Of course, each such union causes a set of a gossip and condemnations. It is interesting that the illegitimate relations of the elderly man and young girl and even the elderly woman with the young guy often do not cause so rough emotions.
As a rule, people around consider that such people marry and marry by calculation. Some guys and girls, marriages entering in unequal in every respect, really want to solve the financial problems. But cases when the person is really attracted by people of advanced age are frequent.
Siegmund Freud said that the man looks for the companion of life similar to his mother, and the woman - on the father. The statistics says that “ late children “ generally prefer people is much more senior than itself. Are even more subject are those who were brought up by grandmothers and grandfathers. In the last decades more and more spouses give birth to children already at mature age. Perhaps, from - for it consider today that blossoming of female beauty is the share not of seventeen, and of thirty - thirty five years. It is not excluded that the same reason is the cornerstone of increase “ unequal “ marriages.
Society treats marriages where the man is more senior than the woman, even more - less loyally. The union of the young guy and mature woman is caused often by nearly bigger condemnation, than same-sex couple. It is possible for this reason such marriages consist extremely seldom.
Anyway, the lovers who decided to legalize the relations the set of problems waits. Also put here not only in condemnation of society (though infinite reproaches and sidelong glances of friends and relatives are capable to spoil also the most harmonious relations). There are other troubles capable to destroy such marriage.
Most often the difference problem in interests meets. Many psychologists say that within seven years the person has a revaluation of values, and he passes to a new stage of development. If to proceed from this theory, the age difference should not exceed this level.
Anyway, the person of advanced age possesses wide life experience. It also attracts the young girl. The man likes in it in it first of all appearance. But, as we know, appearance very quickly ceases to play a large role, and the person concentrates on internal qualities of a subject of adoration. And then sometimes there occurs the disappointment. Young girl still “ knows nothing about life “ and with it it is simple “ there is nothing to talk “.
The difference in interests is provoked not only by age, but also an occupation. To the girl - the student happens very difficult to understand experiences of the thirty-year-old businessman. To it its problems seem in general baby talk.
However, during joint life of the spouse most often “ get used “ to each other also find a common language. But there is already the following problem. The matter is that “ old “ groom or “ elderly “ the bride most often are not those at all. Usually he is no more than 40 - 45 years old. At this age the body did not gain senile flabbiness yet, and wrinkles even give to shape special impressiveness.
But there pass several years of joint life, and the situation changes. Even if the young spouse does not pay special attention to aging of the beloved, that panics. It seems to it that it cannot attract the woman any more, and he begins to suspect her of changes. It, certainly, ruins marriage.
In the ancient time physicians of many people believed that the proximity (not necessarily intimate) of the beautiful young girl prolongs years of the man, keeps cheerfulness, prevents diseases. Quite perhaps, the young spouse will really distance an old age. But sooner or later it will come. And, if the age difference is too big, the woman risks to turn into the nurse of own husband. Of course, before a wedding there is no wish to think of it, but once the facts face.
However, the true love is capable to overcome everything. There are many happy couples which age difference makes 20 years and more. Therefore you should not consider what connects spouses only cold calculation - only one money are not capable to make the person rather happy. By the way, quite often happens that in marriages of convenience the love is born. However, it already another story altogether.