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As it is correct to communicate, or the Person - a being social

we Continue to comprehend the inquisitive mind secrets of prompt career. And today we will talk about what, from the point of view of social psychology, is a basis of successful promotion. It appears, a basis of it is communication. Through it (communication if forgot), psychologists assure us, it is possible to solve almost everything.

And their first council sounds so - Never miss chance to keep silent . You, probably, already paid attention that the person was given two ears and only one language. It is made for anything other as to listen more and less to speak. And therefore the main skill of competent communication is concluded in ability to be silent and listen. We will also talk about ability to be silent we in more detail.

The matter is that it is possible to be silent differently. It is possible to stare at the same time silly at the poplar growing behind a window, to be scratched and fidget on a chair, and it is possible, having told words, to so gain the interlocutor that he will be ready to make for you anything.

For a start it is necessary to support visual contact. If you are going to speak with someone, then you look at it, but not askance, something is low naklonya " there; (quote inexact). Eyes - not only a window to the soul, but also the subject giving fair ideas of how you perceive other person. All psychologists, from pop Dale Carnegie to confused Eric Burn go on unanimously: Ability to listen to the interlocutor - a basis of constructive communication! (by the way, Games which people " play; and People who play the games - the lines belonging to above-mentioned Eric Burn, but not " group; Guests from the future ) . With eyes, it seems, everything is clear.

There is one more very effective reception constructive silence called accession or mirroring . It consists in ability to specularly reflect behavior of the partner when you consciously adopt basic provisions of a body, hands, gestures of the interlocutor, and you use his important keywords. The main thing to learn to do it it is unostentatious and thin that there was no impression that you copy and you are teased.

Other, less dangerous form of this reception, copying of speed and a rhythm of the speech of the opponent is. Accession by means of a voice - is not so noticeable how the specular reflection of behavior, but is very effective for establishing mutual understanding.