What frighten future mothers by?
So, you thought, consulted to the husband, listened to the internal clocks and resolved to learn pleasures of motherhood. You responsibly treated the health, visited the necessary and unnecessary doctors, passed to healthy nutrition, remembered advantage of physical exercises and vitamins - began to prepare for pregnancy in due form. At last shared “ pregnant women “ thoughts with girlfriends, with mother, with relatives. And here on you information on the experience endured by other mummies fell down. Moreover inopportunely recur the different stories read earlier to the memory. Or plots from movies. In the worst option - from news. And panic creeps in in your soul. Well why at us so like to frighten future mothers? Why in turn in a maternity welfare unit you will surely hear couple of horror stories on pregnancy? Not all from us possess an impenetrable psychological armor to take cover from negative information. Alas, these horror stories get into consciousness, and from there - into subconsciousness, giving rise to fears. The elementary way to dispel these fears - to look them eyes. And it is reasonable to interpret.
Horror story 1. Pregnancy - it is awful! Toxicosis, a huge stomach, a lock - a diarrhea, sleeplessness, slackness, differences of mood, lack of sex (and as a result - the tense relations with the husband - the friend - the lover), further according to the list.
Arguments of mind. Toxicosis can not happen and if you were so not lucky and It is you feel sick constant, then you can be consoled in thought: “ Already three months I eat only a piece of a smoked sausage in day, washing down it with a milk, and at the same time did not die for hunger. It is possible to consider it as experience of future diet “.
The huge stomach is a look from outside. To you personally your stomach will seem “ just right “. It is inconvenient to sleep only in the last month pregnancies, but people get enough sleep and on one side. Besides, by this time you will expect appearance of the child any day and will be able quite to finish yourself: “ Well, one more night and all! “.
The lock - a diarrhea can be prevented healthy nutrition. The thought is not new and is not original, but from it is not less right.
Sleeplessness can be also used for the good - create. Embroider, read, write, draw. You remember only that neighbors, all - sleep, and do not master percussion instruments. And nature will take it`s own, and in the afternoon you perfectly sleep for two - three hours.
Differences of mood are good the fact that you should not apologize for them. Looking at the beaten service, you will shrug shoulders: “ " Hormones;. And your husband - to the friend - the lover will have nothing to cover - against the nature you will not go.
Lack of sex the first and last three months is offered by our careful doctors irrespective of your health. There would be their will - so would tie you for nine months to a bed - “ on preservation “. And you make a start from a spirit of the organism. During toxicosis to you at all not to pleasures sexual, and in recent weeks before childbirth you are afraid of everything on light. The understanding man will not insist. And the understanding woman will please the husband with alternative caress. However, it is necessary to forget about himself in recent months - but you and you will see that your thoughts will be busy not with an orgasm at all.
Other “ pleasures “ at each woman the - disgust for smells, hemorrhoids, back pains, strong “ pinaniye “ baby, heartburn. And everyone approaches creatively their overcoming. My friend dragged with herself a flakonchik “ Red Moscow “ - it was the only smell, pleasant for it. Slightly that - and it brought spirits to a nose. Resistant aroma killed all others.
Horror story 2. Childbirth is long and terrible pains. And nobody will help you. And anesthetic will not be given. And if give, then will unsuccessfully stick. Or not that dose will be chosen. Or still something …
Arguments of mind. And it is good that will not give. Effect of anesthetics on the child is up to the end not studied. You do not want to do much harm to it? Yes, childbirth - not a holiday in a pampas. But it is not as terrible at all as like to porasskazyvat “ skilled people “. The best means to endure pain (well you from it will not get to anywhere!) - it to think not of itself, and of the child. To you - the fact that - you lie to yourself yes you shout. And baby? Not only that around everything is unclear that somewhere it is necessary to creep also the warm, cozy and habitual world, and it gets to cold, bright light and loud maternal cries. Spare at least the child!
Well, and about the fact that nobody will help you … Here as will carry, but all - in maternity hospitals work not “ murderers in white " dressing gowns; agree. Nobody will leave you to die on a table. As support you can go on: “ Everything comes to an end in this world “. Believe that already in one couple of hours after the delivery, lying with an ice bubble on a stomach, you will be overflowed with pride: “ I made it! “.
Horror story 3. Die in childbed.
Arguments of mind. That mortality percentage frightening you in labor (something like 0,1%) is brought out of cases over all country. And someone really dies. But not from childbirth. And from incorrect conducting pregnancy, belief that “ the doctor is not necessary to us, we take out also we will give rise “. I remember, years in seven I got to maternity hospital, meeting one of mother`s girlfriends. Then I saw a great number of the grieving relatives - some woman died in childbed. It made indelible impression on me, having filled with dread. Only much later I learned that that woman passed all pregnancy, having never visited the doctor in a maternity welfare unit, decided to give birth houses without midwife and when something went not so, there were nobody to help it. From there are morals: be not self-confident. You not the doctor to make itself the diagnosis (“ Everything is good “) you have no drugs, tools, and you will not be able to help yourself.
Horror story 4. Pregnancy and childbirth do the woman thick. It never to be again beautiful and thin any more.
Arguments of mind. Inspect - in the summer of young mummies with carriages. And there is a lot of among them fat women?-! The problem of the Russian woman is in what she likes to eat. And in pregnancy there is a wish to eat. And the loving mother-in-law wearing jackets fifty of the last size speaks: “ You should eat for two “. And you eat. And instead of the put 8 kilograms you take 16. After the delivery 10 kg will leave, and six - that will remain. And here your mother: “ You eat properly, and that milk will be gone “. And you eat, gathering four more kilograms. And here, having fattened the baby, you with melancholy see those excess 10 kg on scales. But it is not quantity of food, and in its quality. You can eat though each hour, but on slightly - slightly. It is better, than three times a day to clog a stomach “ chock-full “. And cream cakes to anything. My sister managed one chocolate “ Inspiration “ there is a month - on a quarter of a segment in day. And itself, darling, pleased, and itself, precious, did not harm. And about milk … It is necessary to hunger (i.e. absolutely nothing is) month that it was gone. It is better to eat useful products and to drink the teas improving a lactation. But, frankly speaking, about three months of milk happens rather much, than the Horror story 4 is not enough …
. Feeding spoils a breast.
Arguments of mind. If you do not wear the supporting bras before childbirth, then nothing will rescue your breast. If you initially had it the fourth size, then during feeding can inflate also to the sixth, and after the end of the period of breastfeeding - hopelessly to droop. It is necessary to forget about lacy brassieres and stones. Only sound x / fabric and special models for pregnant women and the feeding women will help you. And after fatten, your breast will return to a former state - that was earlier, receive again.
Horror story 5. The child is forever. It will be near you until the end of your days. Though on the other hand - who else will give you a glass of water in old age and prosponsirut a roof for a shed at the dacha?
Arguments of mind. Look at yourself. Also understand that your child will treat you as you treat the parents now. Till three years he will be afraid to come off your skirt, and in sixteen will tell: “ I am already adult, leave alone! “. Remember, you give birth not for yourself. Your task - to help the child to enter this world, to learn to live in it. And further he will already float. And do not cripple the life at all, devoting themselves without the rest to the offspring, stepping at the same time on a throat to own interests and aspirations. He will not estimate it. Remember the feelings when mother spoke: “ I from - for you did not sleep nights, devoted all life to you, and you!. “. Besides, there is a wise thought: we repay the debt to parents to the children. So do not wait for gratitude from the children for your great feat - it is remembered, they did not ask themselves to give birth, it was solved for them by you and your husband - the friend - the lover. Better make so that your children could be proud of you. You have to be a Personality to manage to bring up the same Persons - self-sufficient, self-assured and realizovyvayushchy the potential.
Horror story 6. With the advent of the child it is necessary to put an end to private life.
Arguments of mind. “ Life did not come to an end, it just changed “ - the quote someone from great. Yes, in the first months your life will be devoted only to the child, and you will depend on his mode - to feed, take a walk, expiate, to lull, and in one couple of hours - all over again. But as soon as you will get used to it, it will turn out that your baby already grew up … The main thing - to remember that all this not forever. Causeless shouts will be replaced by a healthy sleep at night, wet bed-sheets at last will cease to fill the washing machine, and pampers will disappear from the item of expenditure forever. And in a year you will be already surprised how you could get up 3 - 4 times in a night to feed eternally hungry baby bird. And private life will be adjusted again. And when the child will go to kindergarten - yours will finally be given a free hand, and you will be able to return to a former condition of freedom. Whether only it will be as necessary how it seemed?
Horror story 7. The child is a one headache.
Arguments of mind. Against sleepless night on following it is slept even more with pleasure. When there passes cold, the healthy child is even more dear. The baby cannot only be touched - he is capable to enrage whims, obstinacy. Yes, there is a wish to have the silent, quiet, obedient angel, but the spineless amoebas capable only to accept adoration of people around grow from such. You want to see the child such?
Horror story 8. The child`s father will not help you. Because all young daddies are afraid of small children.
Arguments of mind. you also really want that the daddy swaddled the baby and washed to it buttocks? And you are sure that he will make it exactly as you consider it necessary? Well also do not force. All the same nothing will turn out because if the person does not want to do something, he will make it badly. Let earns, exempting you from cares of a daily bread. And in the evening you can take a walk with a carriage. In other words, your newly appeared daddy will help you, but as it within his powers, but not as there is a wish. Besides, when children grow up, fathers cease to be afraid of them.
Horror story 9. All children are ill. All children`s diseases. Constantly.
Arguments of mind. can be avoided Dreadful diseases, having done to the child all relying vaccination. And then measles, a mumps, hepatitis, tuberculosis will avoid your child. And more “ small “ diseases can be avoided by means of a hardening and breastfeeding long (over a year). It is proved that milk of mother contains the substances protecting the child from diseases, strengthening his immunity. Of course, you will not do without cold, but nevertheless it would be desirable that it was the only misfortune of your child.
There is a lot of horror stories about motherhood. Sometimes there is such impression that people around set as the purpose to intimidate you that you “ learned how much pound it is dashing “. In practice everything appears not so terribly. It is necessary only to guess why they needed to intimidate you. Many problems even would not arise at young mother, do not sit at her in the head these fears. Here it is also necessary only to learn their insolvency by the experience.