Whether nurseries " are dangerous; sexual “ games?
Once my friend, young mother shared with me the experiences: “ You Know, and my son began to touch often the genital, I do not know what to do, I say that it is impossible, I disaccustom “. To the son there was a year. She seriously was frightened. And what to tell about parents who notice how their children at the age of 3 - 7 years touch themselves or play in “ obscene games “. Explain to a thicket, force to fall asleep with hands over a blanket, abuse. It seems that it is a problem, actually, let`s understand the reasons of childish sexual sports and we will understand is it terrible.
The child in the first 6 - 8 years of life passes a big way in studying of the world, himself and other people. Moreover, he receives all necessary bases of life in this age. In traditionally Russian culture of the child till 3 years called “ child “. The special attention to a floor was not paid. And here in three years there was a dedication in a floor. To the girl put on maiden clothes, ribbons in braids, - dressed boys respectively.
For the child it is natural to study the body and bodies of others. To find similarities and differences. Children put is made other sense in the actions, than we, adult. Often, all sex education of children is generally reduced to a level of development of hygienic skills, being confused from frank questions of children. Dear parents! For children this subject same, as well as many others therefore to ask “ From where children undertake? “ for the child as naturally how to ask “ Why wind blows? “.
Interestingly and here still that. While the child studies the hands, legs, the person - parents are quiet. But when the child begins to be interested in a structure of the genitals, many parents come to confusion and begin to suspect dissoluteness and perversity of the child. Interests parents: how to treat sexual games of children. Children are much more observant, than it seems to us. They very quickly make to themselves idea of a role of each of parents in a family, about the leader, about the one to whom it is possible to listen and whom and it is not obligatory. From them it is impossible to hide also one more aspect of life - intimate. Especially as with development of mass media in the child the possibility of access to such information extends. But in consciousness of the child this information usually does not gain erotic character.
So, in process of receipt of information sexual games of children, most often - game fragments in a family begin. Small children can sometimes imitate actions of adults, representing any form of sexual activity. Having found such games, adults come to confusion. But it is not a reason neither for jokes, nor for indignation. Such “ sexual “ game do not cause sexual excitement in the healthy kid, and yet there is no incorrect intervention of the adult, he plays unconsciously, perceiving this aspect of life as quite natural and integral what it, in principle, also is.
However the adult should beginning to ask as everything was, to extort details, to shame - and the perception of the child right there changes, he begins to understand that he entered some special area burningly interesting and very forbidden. Interest does not vanish, and, on the contrary, increases. Only now the child knows that this secret and needs to be hidden. Also to the child the sense of punishment is often unclear, but there is always a feeling that if its act is bad, then, so and adults close to it whom it copied do something unlawful, dirty and obscene. It creates a psychological barrier between the child and parents. Besides, in consciousness of the child the image " is formed; interest in genitals and their contact - it is bad “. And it can be a basis for development of complexes, to become a source of secret experiences and all deviations.
The second aspect the is as follows: child seeks to derive pleasure from the body in what it was shown. And if children in it to reproach and limit, it can entail formation of the wrong relation to sexual life further. It is necessary to correct and direct behavior of the kid competently.
So, you should not be afraid of games in which children study themselves and an opposite sex. Moreover, you should not condemn and blacken this interest. Let better the kid develop on your eyes. By the way, in old times children to very adult age went to a bath with parents, saw them undressed and could investigate. Not to mention that all slept in one room. It is necessary to talk that important to the child. It is better to be the friend to it, than the supervisor …