Whom it is possible to call the adult?
the Child grow, and he becomes an adult? Not always.
Sometimes and speak: “You are already big!“ That is you have big hands, legs, a body, the head, but it belongs to the sizes, but not a psychological maturity. In other words, the big uncle or the aunt can remain a child on life. You such met? It is interesting to think and whom then it is possible to call the adult?
Children have the main slogan in life - “I want!“. Acts, the relation to people around, beliefs are defined by it that it is good and that it is bad.
Everything is simple, I want - I play, bothered - threw. Other child or the adult is pleasant - I will be found; bothered, it is not interesting, offends - I do not want! I will not be found. Candy I want, porridge I do not want!
Wise tutors know: to teach the child, he should be interested. In other words, to make so that appeared it “I want“. But life goes, and requirements to children increase, the phrase “even more often appears you have to“. What horror, it is in a conflict with habitual “I want“! You have to go to school, well study, respect seniors, do exercises, clean up, help parents, etc. But I do not want! And whom it concerns, now you have to! If the children`s protest is stronger than the authority, suggestion, educational influence of adults, then the child has a chance to win the sacred right and further on life to work, being guided exclusively by motivation “I want - I do not want“. In this case the person will become big, but not the adult that guarantees in life big problems and to him, and surrounding people.
There is a good word - responsibility. The adult only the one who is responsible for the acts. The one who, realizing own “I want“ can be guided and in other words - it is necessary, has to, I can, I will make.
The adult begins to care not only for himself, but also for others: “it puts porridge on a table“. Children resort and eat, without reflecting from where and that undertakes, they use because there is an adult who cares for them.
And still definitions.
A maturity - financial independence and a personal liberty, and also responsibility for consequences accepted (and not made) decisions.
Financial independence - the ability based on knowledge, skills, experience in any situation to receive enough the material (financial) benefits for own needs, and also for support of neighbors and other worthy people.
A personal liberty - ability to make decisions irrespective of opinion of people around. To arrive according to the beliefs and to bear full responsibility for consequences of the actions. Of course, it should be taken into account circumstances and opinions of people around, but the decision needs to be made independently.
We will investigate definitions on an example.
The young man desired the girl, they had a love. Everything is normal. Beautiful words, romanticism, sex, interesting communication. But over time the guy began to notice that the girl strains claims and whims a little. Sex with it is pleasant, and communication already not really. In other words, I want sex, and I do not want a claim.
They say that from close communication there are children, and not for nothing speak. Well, the young lady became pregnant. Now its requirements became very concrete: you have to marry, the villain! I want in marriage! What do I do now? But the young man is guided by the desires too, he answers: “And I do not want, farewell“. Here such situation from life. I will specify: to these children - one 30, other 23 years.
It is big children. Both it, and it. The guy wants sex. The girl wants in marriage. They are guided not by responsibility, and to the nurseries “I want“. However, adults?
We will return to definition. The adult the one who is ready to bear responsibility, including financial, for consequences of the acts, to speak to himself: “I have to, means - I can, I will make“. But these children know only the “I want“ therefore a claim is made each other.
Whether the girl should marry it? Not the fact. Whether the guy should marry in this situation? Too not the fact. The child who will be born at two of these children, most likely, will be very unfortunate. It will be born already with the “I want“, and he will be met by two parasites who cannot cope with own “want“. Difficult situation.
Decisions can be a little, but someone should take the responsibility. Think, as if you - I hope, adults - solved this problem?
However definition is given and how to cease to be ill “childhood“ and to become the adult?
1. Begin to earn money. I understand on the subject of how it is possible to make it, it is necessary to write three books. It is a separate subject. But nevertheless. Money is resources, the adult`s tool for support of, native, close and other people who need the help. If you very careful, but poor, then your opportunities of the adult are very limited. Children can have any ambitions, desires, but if they are not provided with a financial possibility of adults, then and will remain just fruitless desires and dreams.
2. Be independent. Without the first point (earn money) it will hardly turn out. The financial independence is more notable, the it is more than opportunity to make decisions independently.
3. Begin to care. The circle of cares of the adult are much more, than at the child. Help, put the knowledge, abilities, skills, experience, finance, in the close people, find others worthy which need your care. Perhaps, it is worth creating new interesting projects which will give special meaning of life and will remain to other people. All adults and great people therefore we remember them acted this way. Than you are remembered?
4. Be responsible. The adult is responsible for the actions. Not as our government for defaults, theft of treasury, a bribe, - words, and is real: money, time, energy, an investment of forces in correction of incorrectly made decision.
5. Be sincerely healthy. The adult - the child does not control the emotions, often makes a claim, considers that people around all have to him, is sensitive. He a lot of things wants to receive and is not able to give with pleasure. Sincerely healthy adult is aimed to impart, first of all, knowledge, abilities, experience, finance to worthy people. Just at it there is a lot of it, it the adult and what to take from the child?
Good phrase: “You - either part of the decision, or part of a problem“. And so, adults are, most likely, the decision. Adults are children, most likely, - problems. Look around, look, you are surrounded by adults? And you who?