To marry how much is? In money, the benefits, the rights...
the Marriage - serious, at least, many men so talk sense, and correctly do. But how seriously think of it, estimate consequences, consider options? In this life it is necessary to pay for everything. I suggest to think together that it was not necessary to pay for the wrong decision then.
Perhaps, you are not ready to a marriage yet? But if, having estimated all pros and cons, you understand that you do right thing, then as Socrates spoke: surely you marry, the good wife will get - you will be an exception, bad - will become the philosopher.
When the man lives one, as a rule, on livelihood and some entertainments of money is enough. The independent girl who works can quite provide herself too. Under the law of addition, after marriage the income has to develop and, respectively, has to be enough for a family of money. But simple arithmetics in family finance does not work. Now is not enough for it, claims at it appear, there is not enough money together - of
Happens so that some women have not enough that all were crazy about them, still it is necessary to them that from them all were without money. There are also men who hope to save on keeping of the wife, without understanding that it is all the same how to stop hours for saving of time. But often financial crash comes at the child`s birth, happy father and mother realize, as this pleasure costs very much.
As a rule, objectively financing during pregnancy, childbirth, and also three, five years after the birth of the child lays down on the man`s shoulders. For example, in Moscow on modest estimations 12 - 15 thousand dollars a year on keeping of the baby are necessary, the food, clothes, costs of experts (massage, training, doctors) enters here provided that dityo healthy and is ill nothing serious.
Creation of the minimum comfort costs very much, for example, if the family lived in the two-room apartment, then with the baby it is good to get three-room, and it is absolutely exciting to rent the house near Moscow outdoors. And that mother could distract from education process, it is necessary to employ the professional nurse. Count how many it will cost.
It seems to me that many girls in the financial plan are more far-sighted than men. Naivety of women - the myth which is carefully stored for the good of men. Choosing the applicant for a hand and heart, they count also on its pocket that from the point of view of responsibility for preservation of the family relations in the future, worthy education of the child very correctly. Often families break up, for example, because of impossibility to remove housing and to live separately from parents. Girls are practical, they know in how many they will cost the man therefore try to choose more financially well-founded.
Many men just do not think of it, and in vain. If it is not ready to provide a family, but you decide to marry, then you - irresponsible. That is you do not want you (can not) to be responsible really (money) for consequences of the made decision. Financial wellbeing is the base of a strong family, and love - the beautiful lock which should not be under construction on sand or a bog of the credits for the car, the apartment. Therefore be honest - consider.
Quite I assume that it is possible to sit down together and to estimate, think, for example: we love each other, well. Are ready to live together? How many it will cost? A family how the successful enterprise who and how many can bring in authorized capital? At the expense of what means we will develop? What will be able we to afford? When, in how many years it is possible to give birth to the child? Good questions, they open eyes and help to see reality.
of the Benefit
the good word - wellbeing. For example, there lives a man and receives from life the benefit, material, physical, sincere. All look and see: it - safe that, naturally, attracts girls. The benefit - what comprises a certain positive sense. For men women can have it career, success in business, prestigious expensive, fast car, free time for friends, personal hobbies, sport, popularity, recognition in favourite business.
Some of the listed benefits are desired also women, but, as a rule, with other contents, filling. To marry - it means to lose part of the received benefits. For example, popularity at other women can not be pleasant very much to the wife, new expensive car will wait as now a family - the main thing, money goes there, free time for friends is replaced with shopping with the wife, a trip to the beloved mother-in-law, etc. That is, objectively, the man receives less benefits to which he got used till a marriage. Well if the wife and a family gives something bigger, than habitual wellbeing.
It is necessary to realize that a family - all this. Therefore think that it is more important for you: in total or family. In this joke there is a joke share, it is necessary to be ready to refuse some habitual benefits, to make it conscious not to be disappointed in the wife and the family relations. Solve for yourself: you are ready?
“To marry - it means half to reduce the rights and to double the duties“. Arthur Schopenhauer.
One of the main issues of a family - who in the house the owner? All family conflicts as however and others, are based: on desire to draw attention, race for power, avoiding of failure, revenge.
The power in a family is good existence of the rights, main the one who makes the decision. There is opportunity correctly to care, that is at discretion, but along with it it is necessary to take the responsibility, and it happens not easy. If the man resolves issues of financing, creation of the warm atmosphere in a family, then it has more rights at decision-making. If the man does not cope with the duties, and the family is “pulled“ by the woman, then the rights has to be more at it.
But anyway, those rights which were till a marriage at the man will not be any more. For example, it will not be right to meet freely attractive girls, or it will become strongly limited, to it it is necessary to be ready. Perhaps, there will be no right to solve when to go for soccer, fishing whether one can go to holiday or with friends - now all these, earlier natural, it is necessary to discuss and coordinate the rights with the wife, at least.
Answering the question “To Marry How Much Is Personally to Me?“, everyone can weigh what it is easy to refuse what it will be difficult and what in general cannot be cleaned from the life, and, above all - for the sake of what? If are sure that the marriage will bring you many benefits, the rights, other benefits, then there will be an understanding why to refuse what you have.
Along with it it is useful to think not of what you can receive in marriage, and about what is capable to be given to other person. It can turn out so that for you there is a lot of benefits in creation of a family, but own contribution is minimum that too can be the cause of difficulties in the future.
of P. S.
For anxious with the question “And where Love?“
If was not understood, then do not try. The man`s love, except romantic snivels, assumes reflection and responsibility, sometimes it is called - wise love. If another is close to you, it is good too, but in article about wise.