Man and woman. Who will win war of floors?
Entertaining paradox: about female psychology and complexes of talk it is much more, than about problems of a strong half of mankind. Perhaps, we got used to feel as the weaker sex and therefore we are not afraid to speak about own shortcomings and fears. As we know, the problem inflated in subconsciousness to the sizes of an elephant, being sounded, will lose force and will become that whom was - a little fly.
But men are not that. Mothers who absorbed with milk installation on heroism and the status of the conqueror, they, without corresponding socially - to cultural stereotypes, lose not only feeling of internal harmony, but also self-esteem.
Books of our childhood told tales of noble and successful men, movies drew shape of the real fighter for justice ready to be at war with all world evil … But in life all where as is more difficult and more fancy and to demand from the elect or the husband of compliance to the book prince charming - is infantile. And what to men to realize unattainability of youthful ideals? And if appearance shortcomings for them never are paramount, then the personal self-assessment, insolvency in career and in a love field are capable to make life a misery fairly.
Still established opinion imposes on the man of the obligation to be a defender and the supporter of a family. Let the modern man with the gun or onions atilt do not go to hunting to fill up a mammoth or a wild wild boar, but he for the peace of mind has to earn on the maintenance of a family. How many marriages fell only from - for the fact that at some stage the woman got paid more, than the man. Thus, to marry the rich bride to this day it is not considered shameful. Though do not give my God to the wife even incidentally to prick the spouse with the superiority - pain will be intolerable and explosive.
The boy since young years is adjusted that he is a supporter, a poilets and a stronghold of future family. When the adult man realizes the defeat in this field - complexes are inevitable. Most of rather poor men sincerely suffer from - for impossibility to present to the beloved diamond suspension brackets or to be sent by all family on leave to the Bahamas. But even more they suffer from public opinion to which they cannot show the solvency.
If in recent times possession of the apartment, car and giving, then was considered as top of achievements now when this set became public, the special attention is paid to quality of the aforesaid benefits. And what to the one who in a strength of mind is not capable to make money and to put at legs of the civilization loved achievements?
Of course, there is a certain percent of happy people whom do not touch on such issues at all because they have a favourite business or own castle in the air, they are undemanding in life and contemptuously treat delights of a material world. Alas, it is the rare lucky persons who realized wisdom of life, however, often lonely and nobody witnesses, all of us how expressed neglect to a filthy lucre, got used to modern life and are not capable to doom themselves to monastic asceticism voluntarily.
Unfortunately, the majority grown on stereotypes, but which did not manage to fit into a rigid framework of the present sharply realizes the defeat even if it does not show and hides sincere turmoil. They do not want to fight, look for the place in the sun, to prove something or to engage for the right of possession of the woman of the dream or fantastic wealth. They lack spirit, they prefer inaction and heavy sighs. And the truth, old as the world, says that the evil spirits as it is painted are not so terrible. But unless the soldier openly can recognize the shortcomings and address services of the psychologist? And as advantage how to look to people in the face?
And here the most weak in spirit seek consolation in drink, filling in a grief on an ancient national habit, and others stake on women and are consoled in a rank of the subjugator of female hearts. But someone is not fated also it, it turns into the quiet and timid little person of, darling, but weak-willed. Some with the last bit of strength strive to hold a good mine at bad game, representing the absolute macho, raise a self-assessment at the expense of neighbors.
So there are ways which are temporarily replacing full existence and sincere balance.
From all substitutes the most dangerous - the house tyranny when the stalwart of Acacius Akakiyevich terribly knocks a fist on a table and demands Russian cabbage soup from the intimidated spouse. And every time when at work it faces the next outrage, will heal the wounds it by means of innocent members of household. How many love boats carried in spills from contact with cruel life - does not give in to calculation!
Jeunet, according to the husband, is required everything at once, it needs stability, the reliable back, material welfare and sexual satisfaction. Though, in actual fact, the woman there is more realist, and the sane spouse will never force to get the elect from the sky the moon and stars. But fathers of families, staying in own concepts how has to live in this world, are on a slippy slope of provocations, venting internal dissonance in a family. Not for nothing Bernard Shaw used to say that marriage is similar to an avalanche which was brought down to the own harm by the young man and the girl, having reached for a flower.
Each of us has weak places, and close people best of all know painful points. Once we risk to realize that the beloved husband and the father turns into the tyrant, systematically and subconsciously cultivating in dear people inferiority complexes. Petty cavils, irritation, the inflamed suspiciousness, peevishness or a frank domestic tyranny, up to a manhandling, are not always congenital signs of bad temper.
Often, thus the soldier - the loser tries to take a revenge and though a little to feel in the lord`s skin, let in the closed space and with minimum number of citizens. And in actual fact this poor fellow who tortured all house is gentle and vulnerable as the little boy who is capable and ershisto to snap and plaintively to cry. Men in general big children, cares and understanding demand not less, than flowers of life. In many respects depends on the woman whether her elect will be able to find himself in our vague century if the nature did not allocate with its bouquet of advantages and a fighting spirit.
The person is programmed so that he needs to establish a family, to be the favourite, demanded opposite sex sexually attractive. When you there are two, you divide equally struggles of life, feel the back and need in each other.
We love not for image of the real cowboy, Samurai, superspy or just romantic knight, not for the car of a latest model, not for million accounts in the Swiss bank. And all the same that he still did not serve to a post of the deputy executive director, did not buy a country house on Canary Islands and did not give a ride on the snow-white yacht round the world. Love for a light smile, for kindness, for a radiant look, an easy causticity, for a disorder on a desk, for … Not for something, and contrary to!
So let thanks to you he will understand that the material beginning in life not the most important that you should not rasshibat a forehead in a pursuit of own chimeras that the fanaticism and never brought anybody to good, and real heroes were never true machoes, such they were made by director`s imagination.
Besides, God created people with a variety of merits and demerits: courageous and coward, kind and greedy. And still he presented them love...