How to become the good father of
you became a father? It can cause in you mixed feelings: pride of, as the man, a pleasure anticipation from communication with the child. At the same time you can have a feeling of uncertainty and fear: and suddenly you will not cope. To you as the head of the family needs to be responsible for wellbeing of one more Person now.
First of all, do not worry! Not you the first, not you the last. I want to make to you several recommendations of how to behave in this situation. In - the first, always you remember that moral support is necessary for the wife now. For it now the words “ I love you “ it is much more important, than “ I bought you a new " fur coat;.
In - the second, the physical help is necessary for your wife. To help to bathe the child, to descend in shop, it is simple to swaddle him for you it is possible, and your darling will be able to have a rest excess minute. At first rest, it too the person is simply necessary for it.
Among my many acquaintances there is an opinion that education of children is mother`s duty. I assure you, it not so. The father also has to take part in education, and he is not obliged to be strict. The gentle father can always remain the real man.
If you have an opportunity to receive the help from someone else - do not refuse. An opportunity to employ the housemaid will allow your wife to give more to time to the child. If you have good relations with your mother, ask the help for her. Perhaps it is worth employing the nurse, but at the same time it is worth approaching its choice very attentively. Ask at acquaintances if you employ through agency, once the former employers call.
Be ready to what your wife will cease to pay to you much attention. Now she became a mother, and, naturally, she is obliged to be engaged in the child. Do not think that she grew cold to you. On the contrary, you have to remind at each opportunity to her of the love. It can be a fleeting kiss, a smile, a friendly slap - at each couple the signs of attention.
Be not afraid to remain with the child in private. Contrary to the existing opinion, the man to become very gentle and tender in communication with the child. Besides you will begin to understand better it and, subsequently, it will be easier to find with it a common language. Babies very much like a father`s baritone therefore talk to it more, read books.
It is not necessary to refuse any pleasures. If you have an opportunity to have a good time, it is not necessary to refuse it from the principle. The first several weeks it can be considered natural, but then becomes superfluous. You will begin to be tired quickly, to be irritated and, as a result, to be angry with the child. My one acquaintances even “ signed “ diapers erased manually children`s soap and carefully ironed from two parties.
Keep in mind that the love to the child is shown not at once. Spending with it much time, you fall in love with it, will find the real fatherly feelings. It occurs not at once, and within several weeks. Be patient, persistent and at you everything will turn out.
Be not afraid to ask council other parents. Walking with the child, communicate with other fathers and mothers. Perhaps and you will prompt them something interesting.
In conclusion I want to tell that from the rannegovozrast the child needs to be sure that the father is a person who will be able to understand it and to help it. And this ability to understanding is not similar to that which is shown by mother, it is based not on aspiration to regret, and on a man`s assessment of a problem and ways of its decision. And the father can achieve such confidence of the child in it only through demonstration of the relation.