Fantastic tales of
Special session of the Government.
The Prime minister - the minister enters the hall of a meeting a vigorous, vigorous pace. All respectfully get up and wait when the head of the government takes the place.
- You Sit down, sit down. From the fact that all Government costs money in treasury will not increase. Joke. Dear sirs ministers. I brought together you here on this emergency meeting to report very unpleasant thing. All our measures for rescue of economy were ineffective. Moreover, if we did nothing and all this structure in September went to have a rest to my favourite Krasnaya Polyana, affairs in the country would go much better. Now at us who did not understand yet and I think such a little, a full bum. Therefore I consider that we will be rescued only by a miracle. Who in the Government most important on miracles? The Minister of Finance - to you the word.
- And that, as that, then Minister of Finance. If not my grists, all of us here would not be long ago any more. I suggest to divide all Stabilization Fund into all attendees here and very quietly - very quietly to disappear.
- Good offer, - the hall rustled, but the Prime minister - the minister one look calmed subordinates.
- Nonsense. Why to divide into all, not really clear. What else there are offers. Let`s listen to the Minister of Emergency Situations. At us as I understand, this most emergency situation.
- I think, - the gallant minister who worried about the career of any prime minister, &ndash rose from a chair; it is necessary to give to the people an accurate and distinct signal on independent rescue.
- It as, - the Prime minister - the minister was surprised.
- Everything is very simple. We constantly inspire in our citizens that the Government is responsible for them. And it as all of us here clearly understand, illusion. Let everyone escape as is able, and we wash hands, we divide Stabilization Fund, let and not on all here attendees, and we disappear.
- One more nonsense, - the Prime minister - the minister frowned. - To deprive the people of illusions, all the same, what to cease to show on Petrosyan`s TV. Both threatens with such social explosion, as we will manage to divide - that nothing. The director of the Central Bank - to you the word.
- I Cut a fuck-up, - without rising from the place the Director thoughtfully said. - I have all.
- Here for what I love our Central Bank, so it for brevity and clarity of thinking, - praised the official of premieres. - And where we put the Minister of Agriculture?
- It already in Voronezh.
- You will catch up with Voronezh, Voronezh, horse-radish. Interestingly, we this year will have a sowing campaign? All people to fields on spring can remove.
- Correct decision, - the hall hooted. - Men in white shirts mow a grass, and women in kerchiefs throw stacks.
- I Am afraid, can understand us not so. - the first time for all the time of a meeting smiled the Prime minister - the minister. - No, all - is necessary a miracle. Real, such that again oil on 150 became that we were loved still all electorate.
Ministers imagined this apokliptichesky picture and shuddered. The love of electorate was obviously a burden on them. At this time asked the words Minister of Culture:
- Can do everything - to tell the people the truth. Well could not, well it did not turn out. The people at us kind and easily appeased, will forgive. He has to understand that to fight against crisis by the same staff which this crisis suited useless occupation. Firefighters cannot set fire and extinguish at the same time.
- Still as can, - the Minister of the Ministry of Emergency Situations objected. - Here I remember there was a case in Ethiopia when we extinguished …
&ndash there; Better you in the homeland of something would extinguish, - the prime minister interrupted it. - It seems that here we will think up nothing. Is not present at us in the governments of the Old man Hottabycha. And what will be told by the Minister of Defence?
- I Suggest to declare war to somebody. And at once to be given.
- Correct decision, - the hall rustled. - But only not Georgia, it will obviously not support us.
At this moment to the hall of a meeting was glanced by the cleaner.
- Long you still here to sit think. To me when to tide up, in the evening perhaps. Give, give, on houses. Wizards are lime. And smoked - that, smoked. In total in a smoke, nothing is visible. Everything is time to air here. Open window leaves, open also on houses. The meeting is ended. Miracles are cancelled, cleaning of the room begins.