Tools online of the therapist
People write each other letters long ago, reflecting history of the relations in sheets. With the advent of the Internet and creation of post systems, we entered an era which it is conditionally possible to call “ text of the relation “. More and more people use the computer for an exchange of messages and this way quicker and more effectively than ever before in the history. People began to interact more actively through the text, building up the relationship. It is necessary to tell that written messages which people exchange with each other differ on type. So the correspondence manner through means of a fast exchange of messages, will be unlike communication through e-mail or a chat. Submission of information in blogs other, than in forums. These types of correspondence distinguish sometimes obvious, and sometimes very thin features reflecting the unique psychological atmosphere the consultant, important for online, making the decision about a way of communication with the client. It is necessary to tell that correspondence by e-mail, still, remains more preferable to work. It is explained by its therapeutic value in comparison with other ways of communication. Ability to write, express the thoughts is almost art, and not always the person able to speak harmoniously will be able to reflect it on “ to " paper; as in other also the return is not excluded. Possibly, ability to state effectively depends on written abilities, on ability not only to build a sentence structure, but to feel delight from an opportunity to introduce the ideas and moods through the text. For such people e-mails, blogs and forums (asynchronous communication), are submitted by a zone for reflection where they can express themselves. In those cases where the spontaneous text chats is required, means of an instant exchange of messages (synchronous communication), words evaporate, and the written thoughts do not harden as if concrete, from the person other skills are required. But anyway e-mail messages this small representation of in a cyberspace, some people feel it as part of, the creativity, and, sending it to the addressee, hope that the recipient will treat the text with understanding and respect.
Quality of the relations depends on as far as the person can express himself by means of the letter. Badly written text can lead to misunderstanding, the conflicts as attempt to understand what was meant by the author, gives rise to tendency to a projection of own expectations, alarms, imaginations on another. As well as at conversation, face to face, when one of speakers is eloquent, and another speaks awkwardly and few. As a result it will lead to the fact that the interlocutor will not reveal, and the relations will come to naught. Therefore online the consultant has to feel the client and arrange the style of communication under it. There is an opinion that written language is already obviously safe territory where the person can fearlessly express himself. And for the deep relations only the interlocutor from that party of the screen is necessary. It not always so, but if also the client freely was succeeded to construct the relations, and openly speaks about the emotions, especially without being at loss for words and expressions, then it can say also that it really hurts it. There is a communication between expression of direct emotions, “ live “ and style of a statement, complexity of lexicon and sentence structure. The text changes, just as the speech. For example, impulsive people can aspire your relations to well organized style of the letter where the majority of words will be logically built in the beginning, that is to unconsciously use protection intellectualization. The demonstrative person, with actor`s tendencies, will dramatize the problem, to use smiles and colourful language. To the person with a nartsistichesky warehouse, it is peculiar to write much and long about himself, jumping from an address essence on the person. People with a shizoydnost can get stuck in problem statement details. Of course, different styles of writing can be combined with each other and supplement. It is necessary to help the person to reveal, reduce action of protection. Therefore, online the consultant has to show consideration for the written text and use, the first tool online of the therapist is an analysis of style of the letter and work with it. To what moments it is possible to pay attention in the analysis of the text of the message. Well, for example, on creation of the letter as far as it is accurately constructed as there is a lot of spontaneity in the text, it it is long. Whether the person writes about the feelings or just chilly izlat the facts whether questions contain in the letter as there is a lot of in the text of zakavychenny phrases or denials of the previous thought etc. of
the Second tool which it is necessary to handle skillfully is called anonymity. You do not know me, this advantage to most of the people communicating on the Internet. People know only that you report about yourself. You can hide the personality if you want. On the one hand anonymity promotes liberation, there is a so-called effect of the fellow traveler who can tell everything, you it will not meet more, and another, interferes with trust. Of course, when people have an opportunity to separate the actions from real life and the personality, they feel like less vulnerable. What they tell and do on the Internet, it cannot be connected with their other life. It weakens a sense of responsibility for the acts. Therefore online the therapist has to help the person to build the real image in a cyberspace, it renders deep, psychotherapeutic effect. Well, and, besides, beginning to work in a network it is necessary to take care of own openness what the client would have a feeling of trust to you as to the professional.
It is necessary to divide anonymity and invisibility. In the first case of people controls information which he gives, in the second physical invisibility allows, does not worry about how you look now or what emotions actually you experience. For work online, this effect of invisibility presents to complexity, especially at synchronous communication where reactions of the client quickly change on new messages of the therapist. And to define that the client tests at present, simply it is not possible, so the distantsionnost of communication does not allow to accompany every time the written text with descriptions of the emotions. In asynchronous communication writing of the letter takes some time sometimes hours or days and online to the consultant it is simpler to define the general emotional tone of the letter. It is one more reason for which consultation on e-mail is more preferable. Invisibility is the third tool the therapist`s online. Still S. Freud, carrying out psychoanalysis with the patients, tried to settle down out of a field of vision of the patient. Thus, creating conditions for transfer. In online of therapy it is the rule it is followed by itself. Lack of a face of the interlocutor exerts impact on the text and experience of the relations. You do not see and do not hear the consultant. On the one hand nonverbal hints are lost that does nuances of communication more difficult, and with another remarkable conditions for creation of the psychotherapeutic relations are created. This situation of conversation with another as with itself makes active imagination, kindles the imagination, strengthens a projection. Of course, at the beginning of correspondence these relations have rather formal character, than psychotherapeutic, but over time it changes. In ideal conditions, talking to the client through the text, it is more and more time, we begin to understand and catch these reactions of transfer. Becoming the witness of dialogue with itself, developing skill of introspection at the client.
Of course, lack of communication will have face to face different consequences for different people. For some lack of physical presence can reduce feeling of proximity, trust. The printing text can seem far, formal, passionless, not supporting. And here it is necessary to tell the consultant`s online about the fourth tool, touch means are use of words (adjectives visual), multimedia means (photos, music, pictures, etc.). It is important that visual components were present (smilies, an interval, a font, color and the size etc.) .
The fifth tool in work online of the therapist is psychological time. Communication in a network, especially on means of e-mail, is asynchronous process of communication, that is people should not sit in front of the computers at the same time. Usually it means that terms stretch, and there is no feeling of borders and time. At consultation face to face session to last on average 60 minutes, at therapy online real time is absent, there is only psychological. The cyberspace creates interactive time which for everyone flies in own way. Letters can be re-read, finished. The impression can be made that the therapist always in touch, always on that side of the screen. For some clients it creates feeling of security. It is possible to send several letters in day, submitting to a stream of unconscious. It gives a zone for reflections. It is possible to use the rule 24 hours when, having written the answer, you do not send it immediately, and you wait the specified time and you re-read your message. In work the Internet therapists can use such receptions, using time for deeper study of a problem or to suggest to send clients without re-reading the letter for weakening of action of censorship. It is necessary to tell that in the beginning people are inclined to write therapy often letters, as if being afraid to lose contact, but over time the stream is reduced and becomes regular. Increase in number of letters can speak about a situation aggravation at the client or about sudden deepening of intimacy in the relations. Decrease in rates of an exchange of letters can indicate weakening of communications and about interest leaving. Sharp silence of the partner can speak about strong emotions, to be a sign of anger, punishment.
It is known that in a cyberspace people become more liberated, psychological protection weaken. Sometimes this effect is called a disinhibition. It is a two-edged sword. Sometimes people tell about very personal belongings, about secrets, fears, desires, can show generosity and kindness. In other words become such what in usual life they do not dare to be. And online the therapist has to remember such metamorphoses. On the other hand the effect of a disinhibition can lead to other manifestations to anger, hatred, threats. Having been frightened of the strong negative emotions, the client can stop the psychotherapeutic relations. Online therapists should learn to use positive liberation for deeper analysis of a problem and with care to treat manifestation of this effect from its negative side as the probability is high, not to cope with such feelings of the client. The liberation is the sixth tool therapy online.
The tool number seven is “ the therapist`s voice in my head “. In real-life communication we see the person and we hear his speech. We separate the voice from a voice of another. At correspondence the situation changes. We read what is written and the effect of a voice of the therapist in my head is created. Of course, we understand that the text is written by other person and we can not agree with the thoughts and ideas stated in it. But we will not deny that our reading wonderfully promotes process of an interiorization the therapist`s online. Unconsciously we can think up even with what look the consultant wrote the answer that he thought what feelings he had. Because it, at the time of reading of the letter, is in us. This effect allows to present the person through the text.
At consultation face to face many experts try to establish the parity relations with the client, we with you are equal, I understand you. On the Internet it is simpler to reach it as there is a neutralization of the status. At correspondence attributes of the power are not visible (fashionable office, expensive clothes, diplomas on walls and books on shelves). The fear of punishment for offenses from outside " decreases; imperious “ figures. The feeling of trust allows to say frankly that it concerns, without being afraid that the expert will not understand. Neutralization of the status important eighth tool therapist`s online.
The ninth tool it is possible to call psychological space. Online the therapist comes to you to the house, its website is loaded on your computer, you find letters which it sent in the box. It creates feeling of proximity that the psychotherapist is directly in your vital space. People often feel the text of the relation as an intermediate zone among themselves and to others as interpersonal space, part of another. Character of the relations - reading, the letter, thoughts, feelings, everything in our head.
The psychotherapist can keep all text messages which are sent by the client, unlike the real world where it is more difficult to keep constant account of told. So, online the therapist can always see correspondence and track psychodynamics of development of the relations. To write the answer qualitatively of other level. This tenth tool - archiving, gives big advantages in work. Besides, it is always possible to use quotes of the client for the illustration explained to you thought or to reconsider what was told by your partner, to refresh memory. The psychotherapist can induce the client to create the archive and to invent various exercises, on the basis of the analysis the client of own texts. For example, online the therapist can pay attention on what pieces of the text the client places bigger emphasis, it is an important point for diagnostics as it shows what information is for the client especially significant and emotionally loaded. Re-reading old messages, you will find other nuances there, look from other point of view. It is always pleasant to people to realize that you remember what they wrote to you once.
Of course, the listed above tools are conditional and the list it would be possible to continue, the most important, it to give help, to the person who addressed you. Especially as the head remains the most important tool of any expert, still.