How to cure soul pain? A source of problem
In article about when the psychotherapy is necessary, I wrote that some situations will wound us, leave marks and scars in Soul. Touches to these wounds cause painful , inadequate reactions just as the acquaintance, without knowing about what you have “ favourite callosity “ (about which you also forgot), incidentally will touch it. From pain you can shout, take offense at it or even to strike in reply. Of course, your acquaintance will be perplexed: “ For what?! “. Such act will be inadequate to a situation.
At us there is a lot of such painful, not cured places in Soul. Sometimes we learn about them at the most inappropriate moment and instead of, having defined to undertake healing, we take offense at those who showed them to us, and even more we aggravate a situation.
For a start we will define from where these sincere wounds undertake and how they exert impact on our present life.
The main reason for emergence of mental anguish are the situations which occurred most often in the early childhood in which to you was very much - very badly, but you had no opportunities of change of such situation. It is clear, that the child can seldom resist to the adult, and by the nature needs love.
Humiliations, unreasonable punishments, violence, bans, outstanding promises, pushing away can be an example of such situations, restriction when the child is left against his will and anything without explaining one house, in hospital, in kindergarten and many other cases which ended with disappointment, deep offenses, fears of death, loneliness, injuries of uselessness, abandonment, devotion.
As a result the situation in all details and details, plus to it all awful feelings which were endured by the person, and a conclusion to which he came, for example is engraved in the memory literally of :
- people cannot be trusted;
- life is unfair;
- I can be thrown;
- I is necessary to nobody;
- me cannot be loved;
- so will always be (in sense, it is bad);
- cannot be changed nothing...
and many others, destroying our life. And it is real pain of soul by which it is impossible to pass and to which it is impossible to close eyes.
Further in life there are situations, something sooner or later reminding endured shock and as in memory everything is written down together - details of a situation, feelings and conclusions, they emerge also everything together, generating inadequate reaction. To understand why I was not self-controlled in, apparently, simple situation, very not easy because roots it lies and it is fed in much earlier period.
Simple experience - the chewing leads situations in mind only to strengthening of emotional intensity and fixing of conclusions therefore in the following times reaction will be stronger.
In this case thoughts have feelings, thoughts increase emotions and the situation is girdled.
Therapeutic work will be based in this case on breaking this link ( bright details of a situation - feeling - belief ) and to bring sensual energy out of an inner world in external.
It needs to be made then to see that circumstances and forces the presents differ from nurseries to draw correct conclusions which, in turn, will remove from a vicious circle of the repeating situations and reactions.
In the following article you learn about what therapeutic help it is possible and it is necessary to render to itself.