How to improve good relations with the son-in-law?
are jokes about " So much; love “ the son-in-law to the mother-in-law that, apparently, the normal relations in a sheaf the mother-in-law - the son-in-law cannot have any relation to reality.
And there are still mothers-in-law that hope for a miracle and try to be to the son-in-law “ mother “ prepare for it, what is more tasty, all paths run, and it all is dissatisfied.
And as to it to be happy if the person to HIMSELF home comes, in the family, and there - the foreign, in general, person at which neither to undress home-style, nor to relax after heavy day of work, nor with the wife there Shura - messes to get everyones … by
In a word, its private life is attacked (and in his own family!) what to the man to take quite hard.
CONCLUSION: the territory of a young family has to be inviolable! Even if the son-in-law lodged in the house at the wife`s parents.
Of course, separate housing - the most reasonable pledge of good relations between two generations. Then it is much simpler to respect sovereignty of a young family: if you want to visit young people, then call before, warn about arrival. Do not impose the help, you appreciate, everything that is done by spouses for the house and a family, respect their opinion, do not bother with councils. And visits, by the way, too.
And in the general apartment it is desirable to build the relations with a young family, as with good neighbors, but not as with dependent on you “ children “.
Well and how to be if young people arrive, from your point of view, unreasonably?
In - the first, your point of view - not necessarily the ultimate truth. The world very quickly changes and it is not surprising that young people a little differently look at life.
In - the second, give advice (but not orders!) as it is possible more tactfully. Eventually, if you did not teach the daughter to conduct correctly economy, it is reasonable to dispose of money and to care for itself and about darling is, first of all, your fault.
And in - the third, grant to young people the right for a mistake, it is their own life!
There is also other kind of the mothers-in-law, firmly convinced that “ such son-in-law “ to them it is not necessary that their sacred duty to open eyes of the daughter, what worthless person her husband.
In this case, dear mothers-in-law, the most suffering person - your own daughter. You not “ you save it from this easy rider “ no! You destroy its private life (perhaps because own not really it was successful?) also you subject to continuous humiliations as the being not capable to be guided in life to understand people and to fall in love “ worthy person “.
Here council can be only one: leave the daughter and her husband alone, be engaged in own affairs, do not make the life of others miserable.
In sum if the respect for him and HIS WIFE is the cornerstone of your relations with the son-in-law, and at all not desire to construct the daughter`s life to your taste - good relations with the son-in-law (and gratitude of the daughter) are guaranteed to you.