What tell gifts about? Part 1
the Infinite series of holidays begun and headed New year give a lawful reason to talk about everything that they introduce in our life. I think, sometimes it is worth distracting for a while from problems of relationship and to talk about pleasures! Otherwise there can be an impression that joint life is an eternal fight and overcoming of difficulties.
And why only unfortunate, naive men and women in all centuries so strive for proximity? Probably because actually everything is not so terrible, not so it is not enough happy couples and that in the most joint life there are a lot of small and big pleasures. And, probably, it is much more, than at people lonely.
But today let`s stop on such small pleasures of life as gifts. Of course, gifts give all, but in the relations between the man and the woman, and in particular in the long relations, this ritual gains the greatest importance.
So why it is so pleasant to receive gifts? Positive emotions usually arise when some internal requirement is satisfied or when real events surpass our expectations (therefore we so appreciate surprises). And if to consider that the person has requirements not only biological, but also the highest, purely human, then the satisfaction of the last (for example, esthetic) is perceived as the greatest award.
The one who loves by all means wants to express the love in the form of a gift, and its gift means much more for him, the for this purpose, the it intends. The gift is more expensive, the it is got by big efforts, the love is stronger. At the same time, of course, the price of a gift has not a direct bearing on its market value. It is defined by the subjective attitude towards him - and the one who gives, and the one who accepts this gift.
Therefore not too trust words of love of the admirers avaricious on gifts. It is much simpler to tell that-. And the gift is already an act. If your gentleman is rather poor, he all the same will think up that to present you, for example, a bouquet of the blossoming pink chestnuts. But the miser, as if he treated you kindly, it is a pity not only money (that is quite natural to it), but it is subconsciously a pity even for a particle of the heart. The beloved for it is only its private property.
At the same time, and the opposite option when the woman directly - is loaded expensive gifts, in the psychological plan often inspires fear.
Namely: the rich admirer presenting to the lady smart gifts in large numbers often considers that for nothing there is nothing. Its system of values begins and comes to an end with money. Thus, he practically buys future wife, including her by the property subsequently. And the woman if she not too mercenarily, often sees in all this gift tinsel only manifestation of force and courage. And it for it the main thing. Thus, there can be some not joining of mutual expectations.
Therefore in a pursuit for “ prince charming “ to you to judge what of qualities of such admirer you will be able to accept and what - are not present. It is possible that it is pleasant to someone when order them; others prefers to depend on the spouse completely; the third feel more surely when for them everything is solved by the husband. However it should be taken into account soberly everything before answering similar “ dear “ courtings. And if this calculation is for you correct, then, perhaps, and your marriage will be happy.
Of course, it is pleasant to receive as a gift from the husband for Christmas the car, but if the husband presents you something, not too expensive, but at the same time what you long dreamed of, I think, you will be delighted not less …
to Present to darling the most expensive that you have, at all times serves as a graphic evidence of true and deep love. The beautiful and sad story described by O. Henry in the story " can become an example of it; The Gift of the Magi “: spouses, to give each other Christmas gifts, sold the only values: it - the magnificent hair to buy the beloved husband a watch-chain, he - those hours to present it a set of beautiful crests.
To someone the person always seeks to express a good attitude in a symbolical form is an immutable law of functioning of human mentality. For example, flowers which the man usually gives to the woman are a symbol in pure form. On the practical level they are absolutely useless and short-lived. Nevertheless, the vast majority of women and men like both to give, and to receive flowers as a gift.