Tactfulness - it is actual?
What is a step? As it is possible to define the concept “ tactfulness “?
Observance of rules of a good form is the integral sign of the well-mannered person . And it is natural, it is supposed that the well-mannered person has to be tactful, delicate.
So it step? this concept is treated by
In various sources differently. Proceeding from own supervision and a certain life experience I can tell that a step is the sense of proportion prompting to the person that under these circumstances approaches and that does not approach that can be told or made and in what form what should not be spoken or done.
The step is a keenness and modesty in behavior, it is respect to people around, respect of foreign opinion, careful attitude to companions, colleagues, relatives, it is tranquility, self-control , ability to remain unperturbable in any situation.
The tactfulness is sense of proportion which needs to be observed in conversation, in the personal and office relations, ability to feel border behind which as a result of our words or actions the offense at the person with whom we communicate begins.
It is unpleasant to pass for the tactless person .
In order that it did not happen, it is worth remembering more often some useful recommendations .
never brags, does not emphasize the superiority;
does not impose the opinion and taste;
does not afford rough, categorical judgments, it seems “ nonsense “ “ nonsense “ “ rubbish “ (remember whether you use these words in conversation with children, say, about fashion, about modern music?) ;
in communication with the people having some corporal shortcoming avoids everything that could remind them of it;
will never start talking about the taken place tragic event not to cause in people of heavy memoirs;
especially strangers do not expatiate on especially personal relations;
does not read someone else`s letters, does not overhear, does not look in others windows (and if suddenly incidentally became the witness of any scene, the conversation which is not intended for strangers will never dare to make it property of others);
never finds out with anybody the relations in the presence of strangers;
will not embarrass other person, will pretend that did not notice an oversight (you remember how A. P. Chekhov in the letter to the brother wrote: “ Good education not that you will not spill some sauce on a cloth, and in what you will not notice if it somebody makes another “) ;
the vanity and dignity of other people is able to spare;
we suffer to shortcomings and weaknesses of others.
The people`s artist of the USSR Nikolay Akimov in the article “ About good manners “ wrote: “ … The kind relation to people around does not cause any additional expenses, does not violate the budget of the person, does not exhaust him with back-breaking toil. It in full sense the free supplement to life, and later when it becomes a habit, it is made automatically, without losing at the same time the salutary influence “.
There cannot be actual or irrelevant a mutual understanding, keenness, humanity, good breeding.
is a component of universal values which the person is living.
In our rough time of information, speeds, high technologies very much it is important to to keep in itself the Person , that is not to lose feeling of sensitivity, humanity, not to lose ability to feel soul of other person and not to wound him a blurt, a look, gesture …
, in my opinion, depends On it not only attitude and mood of the people communicating with you, but also your state of mind and mood because the good multiplied by good is a pleasure of perception of life, people, desire to give to people good, heat of the soul and an opportunity most to be warmed at this perennial spring of human kindness and understanding.]