What irritates the man watching TV?
Dear women! Would you like to live in peace with the husbands or fight - friends? I think that you want. Then following question: whether you know how your man when he is not busy by you, fishing, beer or golf - club likes to have a rest? Besides, I think that the answer is obvious.
Yes! We, men, adore watching TV. And let the weaker sex is jealous, calling a miracle of engineering thought “ TV set “ or even “ the zombie - a box “ - the real man will never betray the loyal friend!
In this article we will consider those things which can lead to a local war in apartment limits: we will talk about what irritates the men watching TV.
What can be worse, than a smiling face which tells you about delights of use of objects of female hygiene? Especially, if this person arose in the most shameless way instead of your favourite moment with firefight of Jedis and the next alien creature. The answer is simple: worse only idiotic advertizing on “ to a vparivaniye “ idiotic goods which was done by the creative producer - the half-educated person, considering that “ it skhavat people “.
Rule No. 1 : you want to make of the beloved of the deadly enemy - tell the phrase “ Darling, switch back. I did not manage to write down phone of shop of the " underwear;. Or similar to it. “ Achievements “ domestic athletes
Each Russian man respecting himself is obliged at least once in life gloomy to joke about the Russian soccer.
- Where?! WHERE???!!! Well, where it beats!!!... Eh, Kharlamova here! - So he is a hockey player... - And IT who??? Football players, perhaps?!
Some psychologists claim that viewing of competitions to participation of athletes of a national team, is a certain masochistic ritual. Lie. It is only an opportunity to exhaust, collected at work, on someone except the beloved.
Rule No. 2 : You want to see explosion of a hydrogen bomb from distance of an outstretched arm? Interfere with process and ask a question with sarcasm: “ Well, with what there the account ours won? “ Series
When viewing series which twist on our TV Evgeny Grishkovets had two questions: “ How people can speak so? “ and “ How they can put on so? “. It is the quietest reaction from all possible. For the real man the word “ series “ causes associations it seems “ tear / snivel / nonsense / marasmus / torture “.
Sometimes, however, also exceptions to the rules meet. One of hundred series is really struck with the reasonableness, acting and direction. BUT ONLY NOT WHEN IT is SHOWN FOR the 100-TH TIME ON the TENTH CHANNEL!
Rule No. 3 : You have an irresistible desire to learn sense of the term “ genocide “? When your blessed comes from work before put (naturally to look at a match between “ Zenith “ and “ CSKA “) declare to it that today you intend to watch the next " series; My great nurse “ and anything more.
Current - show
Looking at this action, there is a thought that the staff of department of advertizing just could not sell this broadcasting time. Could not sell, was not enough for new series of money, and time should be taken with something. Here also people sit, procrastinating “ global problems of mankind “ which actually “ abbreviated piece of nothing “ which are solved in 30 seconds. The real man looks at IT, and understands that an intellectual apocalypse of the nation not far off...
Rule No. 4 : You have a chance to look how physically and male mentally healthy individual fells into a coma! You want? For this purpose it is enough to seat of him in front of the TV and to force to watch transmission “ Big washing “ “ Five evenings “ or “ Malakhov + “.
Transfers with false heroes
After such programs there is a wild feeling: with the naked eye it is visible that all lie insincerely and very simply. There are no doubts that it is visible and to directors of these “ hand-made articles “. Long ago became a norm when work of the reporter turns into hack-work. Sensations are molded as pancakes, “ havat people “.
Rule No. 5 : If you need to spoil mood to the man, then just show it “ documentary “ transfer how the woman married the alien, and he, the reptile such, threw it and flew away.
Humorists Petrosyana, Elena Vorobey, Regina Dubovitskiye`s
and other figures of the Russian humour cause a nervous tic, a preinfarction angina and desire to realize hvatatelno - a throwing reflex in the average Russian man. Variations are possible. Anything, except a smile.
Rule No. 6 : If you were not in New Orleans in 2005 and, respectively, did not witness an event under the name the hurricane “ Katrina “ in the presence of the man switch to the " program; Smekhopanorama “ “ Curve mirror “ or something similar. Destructions are guaranteed. Other
the Last irritant which is intruding upon leisure of homo televisorus (the person televizorosmotryashchy) are external factors. If you consider that loud talk, telephone trills, the turned-on radio, the people flashing in front of the screen do not prevent viewing of the TV, then... If it is short, then your man has the opposite point of view. Take me the word.
Rule No. 7 : For receiving nervously unbalanced aggressive personality with maniacally - depressive psychosis you have enough: 1) to arrange the interlocutor to the right of your man, 2) to take a position at the left, 3) to begin negotiations directly through a cranium of a man`s individual. The result depends on patience experimental and can be shown in 5 - 15 minutes.
I hope that clever women will understand what to what everything that these 7 rules were not carried out will begin to do. Why only clever? Because very clever know it and so, and silly it is simple to explain something there is no sense. I hope that such small digression to man`s psychology will help to avoid at least a little bit of quarrels and contentions. To in total you good and good luck!