What to do if the child distracts you from works?“ Sometimes it seems that my children have no respect for what I do if it is not connected with them. That I did - made a lunch, imposed a make-up, talked to the neigbour who glanced for a minute, - they consider that they have the right to snatch on me to capture my full attention to them. Sometimes it seems to me that my children are programmed to give up all the affairs and to require my attention as soon as " phone rings out;.
U you too such problems are? You are not lonely! Such irritating behavior of children from two to five years (and sometimes and more seniors) is very widespread as children of such age still are at very egocentric stage of development. They are concentrated on own desires and needs. Some parents from the very beginning abuse children for intervention, others concede them to requirements. If your child sees that, constantly interrupting you, he receives that he wants, can be sure, such behavior will proceed.
What to do?
- Show to your child that you will be with him soon, even when you continue conversation with other adults, having taken the child by hand, stroking on a shoulder, scratching a back or sowing and having embraced him.
- To finish conversation with the neigbour, give to the child some task. Make a pause, look to it in eyes and tell: “ Darling I will be engaged in you as soon as you close a gate “. And then fast speak!
- Suggest your impatient child a little most to talk to the person who calls you. It can change his mood.
- Put three-minute hourglasses near phone and quietly tell: “ Darling, as soon as all sand will be poured down, I will stop speaking by phone and I will be ready to listen to you “. Then put clock so that the child saw them. (Keep the word!)
- Be creative. For example, when your phone, " calls; answer “ at first by toy phone of the child. Tell: “ Zhenya, it you “. And then take the.
- Immediately show that estimated obedience of the child pursuant to your request to wait. Tell: “ Perfectly you behave “ or “ What obedient child “ or simply “ Thanks “.
And some more councils:
- Plan the day so that you had time to stay with the child “ in private “ and he could receive with anybody not shared your attention. When the child knows that later he will receive your full attention, it is less probable that he will interpose in your matter in other time of day. Even five minutes “ in private “ can be enough for the child, and he will feel more satisfaction, than of an hour of constantly interrupted communication.
- Understand that it is very difficult for small child to wait for your attention because he cannot just think of anything the friend except that he disturbs him - thirst, the hurt place or the broken toy.
- Offer your child something interesting to him while he waits. Researches show that even the most impatient children can concentrate attention on a subject which they want or which is pleasant to them. Children who very patiently wait for attention of parents are easily reoriented on other occupation.
- Explain to the child what all people tell and listen in turn. Tell that now your turn to speak with someone, and then will come its turn to speak with you, and you will listen to it. But after that surely keep the promise.
- Tell your child if you are going to be engaged in very serious business that you will be taken some time. Before you begin the occupation, ask the child whether it is necessary for it what. When be released, praise the child if he did not interfere, or interfered less than usually.
- Try to expect and not to allow interventions, being to them ready. Have near at hand an animated cartoon or a toy with which it is possible to occupy the child while you speak by phone.
- Call to the aid modern technologies. For example, buy inexpensive earphones. Many wireless phones have a special device for connection. Then strengthen a wireless receiver (receiver) on a belt, and you are quite mobile with free hands and can quietly play with children while you wait for an important call.
- Think, maybe, it is worth calling by telephone when children with the nurse or sleep.
- Use e-mail for contacts with friends and colleagues, even at 3 o`clock in the morning: at least, so more quietly!
- From time to time it is worth ceasing to do with what you were busy and to give to the child time necessary to it for settlement of some problem, and then to continue the studies.
- You watch signs that the child on the verge of failure that he cannot suffer more and really needs you. Pay attention to it before it begins embarrassingly rough stickings. He lays down on a floor or clings to your leg? If so, so it is time to postpone the affairs and to be engaged of
- If you promise the child to pay it attention and to listen to him, surely keep the promise (for example, “ When I stop washing the dishes “ “ Right after I close the " window;) . Remember that children perceive literally everything that you tell. Before promising that you will make something in a minute, be assured that you mean minute, but not ten.
It is difficult for small children not to be the center of attention; at big practice and a great patience you can help them to become more sensitive in relation to others, for this purpose they should be taught what sometimes needs to be waited until listen to you!