Rus Articles Journal

Husband, wife and work. How to keep harmony in a family when the wife is more successful than the husband?

Occur opinion that men never forgive changes. Sex of the spouse on the party is perceived by them as a crime against courage, the man in everything seeks to be the first and, whenever possible, only. But, as practice shows, the success can become much more terrible female crime for husbands .

A situation when the wife becomes more successful in the career plan, than the husband - for a long time not a rarity in the modern world. Many couples happily with it live, without feeling any discomfort. But in most cases similar cases are wrapped in problems. The most widespread of them is connected with a competition aggravation in a family. Wives and husbands compete sometimes in the most unexpected questions. Who drives the car better, understands education of children, the politician, healthy food etc. But the most terrible and dangerous type of the competition to marriage can wake up because of the income and career success.

The problem of the business competition between spouses becomes more and more actual from year to year, finding reflection not only in thematic articles, but also, for example, in modern literature. So, very eloquent case is described in the novel Love triangle the famous author Diana Mashkova who is successfully combining roles of the hostess, mother, the writer and a top - the manager. Events in life of heroes of the book are developed against the general work which became the main source of both the income, and problems in a young family. From desire to help the husband the heroine of the novel became deeper to penetrate into problems of its firm and with surprise found out that she copes with them much more effectively. But the ambitious spouse would reconcile to bankruptcy rather, than would recognize that own woman made it at work. Man`s vanity, there`s nothing to be done.

In the described case the general work became the catalyst of the problems which were outlined in the relations, having pushed the heroine to an adultery. How to be to avoid similar option of succession of events in own family?

the Rule first

As soon as the woman tries to obtain success in business, it it becomes quite logical more self-assured, and with achievement of the leading positions also more exacting that cannot remain unnoticed for the husband. The first and main mistake of the successful business woman consists in attempt to reach a dominant position in a family. Anything good it does not lead to if, of course, its initial purpose was not decorative husband. It is necessary to be more attentive to the man and not to allow the direct or indirect claims based on his lower material status. Present to the spouse confidence that without his support to you in any way not to cope. Husbands, regardless of an income level, should not forget that you will not buy the status of the real man for money. In the house something broke? Try to repair by own efforts, without calling the repairman. The wife has problems at work? Help it a practical advice of the independent observer. At last, undertake the organizational issues concerning your family.

the Rule second

the Majority of problems of business women results from the fact that they cannot decide on what man is necessary to them. Being the despotic leader, it is difficult to be reconciled with the exact copy. To two leaders in one territory not to get on. Therefore the woman should learn to have a clear view what she expects from men and to learn to compare the desirable with real.

the Rule third

do not substitute true values material. Often women steep in work, feeling instability of the family back. They unconsciously hide behind work, leaving from painful unresolved problems. And such replacement pours out in larger problems sooner or later. Try not to rush to extremes. Think whether it is worth spending all the life only for reaching material well-being?

the Rule fourth

is frequent

behavior of people the whole family program with installation on the conflict, " operates; only a few from behavior of parents. It is necessary to analyse carefully this point and to understand whether you win back the role in the relations. Whether the same measures and requirements, as in a parental family are applicable in your case? Whether only by a difference in the income your negative emotional splashes are motivated? the Rule fifth If the competition problem already costs


, and quite sharply, find forces and patience to discuss the arisen rivalry, it is opened and to honestly reveal priorities of both parties. If you are able to agree among themselves, then rivalry by all means will develop into cooperation. Spouses are first of all partners, but not competitors.

the Rule sixth

Conclude the marriage contract and in advance agree about that, to a lump to run financial business of a family. Answers to delicate questions clear to both parties can relieve you of a large number of problems. And if business reaches divorce - everyone will keep the own opinion.

Do not forget: marriages in which the woman earns more husband usually break up not from - for money. One business when there is no money at all, another - when, in the presence of the stable income, at spouses is the claims based on own stereotypes to each other. It is difficult for women to keep from a temptation to emphasize the solvency, and men very painfully react to such ways of self-affirmation. Of course, if in a family there is tension, then the family budget can become the powerful activator of the conflicts. However if your relations rather mature, honest and open, then the career success or failure of one of spouses is not able to affect them.