Whether it is necessary to control children and if yes, that as?my parents told that when I was small, I was very lively and noisy child. It proceeded until I did not go to school. I well remember some moments of that carefree cheerful life which sharply broke when I was only 5 years old. I well remember how I sat in kitchen on a floor and played with color cubes, constructed various big designs. A floor was firm, but it did not disturb me in any way. Perhaps, then I was small and chubby. My mother ran to and fro on kitchen, took out stuff from cases and boxes, approached a plate, came back, put everything back, went through kitchen to other boxes … She was always busy.
My elder brother came back home. I do not know where it was. It goes on kitchen, and I look at it from below up. It is high as the huge building. I attentively listen as he talks to mother. He looks at me. It on whole is more senior than me four years. He has to be five or six years old. At that time it carried short panties and polished, but a little shabby boots. I know that some people remember nothing from the life when to them year or two, and can even when they are five or six years old. So I apologize if it seems unreal or unusual to you. Nevertheless, I remember some moments of my childhood, and even infancies. I will remember their all the life.
When I reached respectful five-year age, I went to school. It was interesting. For me this place was new. New acquaintances to children with whom it was possible to meet and stir. New occupations and hobbies. New knowledge. I really with impatience expected that moment when I go to school.
Probably, you think that I made many friends, gained a lot of knowledge and had a good time. Within the first week when I stirred with the pupil sitting behind me (and he, by the way, was not very sociable, and was nervous and often looked at the teacher), all my ideas that the school is something good and light, failed as a house of cards. The school will never be former. For me it will never be the place where the pleasure and desire to study prospers. Actually the school became for me prison. you want to know
what happened? And so. So, our first lesson at school began. We were seated in places for school desks which stood accurate equal ranks. We looked at the teacher. She stood and looked at us, ready if something happens to give to us couple of boxes on the ear. Before starting study, we were told some rules which we had to know surely. Here what the teacher strictly told us: you will not tell
until you raise a hand up. after that you will wait for
until I allow you to speak.
you will not talk with each other during occupations.
If you violate these rules, you will be punished.
did not pass also hour as one of us violated one of these foolish rules. It was sent to a corner to a garbage can. It stood facing a wall about 20 minutes there. Besides, some occurred to begin to giggle.
As it influenced me? What lesson I learned from this situation? I became silent. I became timid and silent. I very much worried when I began to speak without the permission. I dared to speak only if it was sure that I am absolutely right, and otherwise I will be reproached that I tell a complete nonsense.
In several days, appear, the teacher calmed down a little. I noticed that some children begin to talk with each other and they are not punished. So also I began to speak with the neigbour in a school desk - Rosalind. It was cheerful. We laughed and played the fool with each other, and then began to play together on changes. So proceeded until … The teacher cried on me and on Rosalind: “ Stop to stir! “ The silence Set in. My person became red. My confusion grew. These rules returned to game. Rosalind did not want to sit any more near me because I involved her in this trouble. It was the end of our fine friendship.
was required to me many years before I could get rid of these fetters.
Many teachers at schools make similar things. They try to establish complete control over a class. Of course, it sounds is very laudable and it is necessary, however it becomes not so. Eventually, training is a process which consists in communication and mutual aid, and not just in hearing. It includes bilateral communication with different people to receive new ideas and the points of view. It includes development of reason and judgment. In conditions where allow to speak only when address you, neither character, nor self-respect develops. Only revolt or submission develops.
the Writer and the humanist, L. Ron Hubbard, wrote in the article “ How to live with children “: “ If you seek to operate the child if you seek to be his owner, then you lost him " forever;
needs to create conditions for children where they can freely communicate and where they are not exposed to a stress. Such atmosphere is optimum for training. And now about such things as control and discipline - they can be perfectly realized by means of some simple rules and by means of communication. If you want to teach
the children - teach them to be independent, self-assured pupils, but you do not teach them to how to be meek creatures.
If you want to master the principles of successful education of children who will allow you to become a friend to the child and to establish good control and discipline, address in “ Applied Formation of the CIS “ by phone (495) 5094602 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting (495) 5094602 end_of_the_skype_highlighting, the website www. apscis. ru, www. clearwords. ru
About the author: Jan Layens worked in the field of education more than 30 years. In 80 - x years he created the successful center of training of computer literacy in London then he was invited in Los - Anzheles where he headed the international educational organization. In 1995 Jan received an award for the article “ Help the child “ which was published in more than 1100 editions across all America. Now Jan develops the training materials according to the software.